Haunted
by K-Syd
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter “J”, Cameron got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her. Rated M for later upcoming smut language an graphic violance.
1. Chapter 1

**Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.**

Author's Note: I do not own House, M.D or Hugh Laure or Jennifer Morrison or…or… This is my first House Fanfic, it´s my first Fic ever in fact, and English is _not_ my mother language, I´m from Germany. Now, onto the Story.

I´ve posted this chapters already also on my LJ Site http://ksyd. so that´s why I uploading four chapters at one time. Well, more to read for you!

I would like to thank all the very nice and great comments that the people from the community http://community. has left on my site! Go and visit this community, it´s great!

And now here is:

Chapter One

Allison Cameron never believed in fate, and she never believed in God. With all the weights on her small shoulders and the burning burden inside her soul, she never had any reason to believe in such things.

Of course, there _are_ things she believes in. Forgiveness. Sorrow. Hope. The ability to fix things. To fix broken people. To believe in the good side of people. She _had_ to believe that every human being had at least one good Bone. She knows that her ideology is the point of many mocking words out of House´s mouth. That he thinks that she is a naive, way too optimistic person who couldn´t really love a man. That she just kept looking to heal another damaged person. It gives Foreman just another reason to roll his dark eyes at her, seeming slightly peeved. It gives Chase another chance to throw in his believing, speaking to her like she was a never learning child, trying to open her eyes to the real world. But Allison Cameron will never curse her view. Doing that would mean, that there was no longer any hope for herself.

There was still one thing she hadn´t figured out yet. Love. She didn´t know what to think of it. She once thought that love was the key to this world. To all of its problems. That love itself was made out of pure innocent. But since Jared Carter indicated _his_ meanings of love to her, Cameron wasn´t sure of this. In fact, she was sure of nothing.

And thinking of her feelings for House, she could see the connections. To fall in Love with a seemingly cruel and cold guy. Rather knowing that her feelings where a death end for him and therewith for her. And that meant pure safety for Allison Cameron. Something she missed since these last dark days and nights back with Jared. She would rather choose the apparent danger, the obviously though side of love than stepping to another man and get trapped in the same cage again. Loving House was the safest way of love she was able to. A man who doesn´t love you can´t hurt you, right? At least not _that_ way.

At some Point, there´s still a burning anger in Cameron. At herself. At Jared. At _themselves_. At everything. She even couldn´t look at her High School pictures any more. Every photo of her former class showed his face. His beautiful face next to hers. She burned them all, including her yearbook. But she still remembers the words he wrote under his picture. A promise. A sweet and yet powerful promise to her. Years later he turned his lovely words into the living hell. Still, Cameron can´t put out where to blame herself the most. For falling in love with him, back in these schooldays? Or for going back to the class reunion, shortly after her husband had died and the only thing she wanted was a little happiness?

Sometimes, clearly more often than sometimes she thinks at this point, the engraving pain of her memories would come out of their closet and hunt her down. They would make sure that Cameron could do nothing to ignore it. Her memory would once again beat her down, leaving her helpless, destroyed. Sometimes she wonders. Wonders that House, the Master of unsolved puzzles, never seemed to take attention of her mental health in those days. Her burning headache, the never ending pain in her chest, right where here broken heart lies. But after all, Cameron had learned how to delude the world around her. She had learned it from Jared and trough the pain he had caused her. Still caused her.

Till today Cameron never made out the small things that will bring back her memories, release them from the box she cached them long ago. Sometimes it was the smell of old lumbers. The sight of water. The unexpected touch of a colleague, a patient. A hand striking her arm, her hand, even her lab coat. Those more unintentional contacts with another skin would bring out the hidden demons in Allison Cameron. Wich is funny, she thinks. It never happened when _she_ was the one that touched another human being. And she knows that this all is about one thing; about being the one in control. She always makes sure she is. Well, at least she is trying.

Thinking all this, while sitting in her office, darkness surrounding her, Cameron turns around; making sure that no one catches her when she makes a little dance with her thoughts. Looking at the now crushed piece of paper in her right hand she lets out a deep, painfully sigh. In her mind, she just added another trigger to her never ending list. Making a soft laughter she shakes her hurting head slightly. _Of course_. How could she await that another invitation would do nothing to her tortured soul? And while looking at the white note, reading the black letters, Allison Cameron wished with all her heart that's left, that she never got the class reunion invitation in the first place. It would have saved her life. And the life of Jared Carter. Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.

He´s sure that Cameron didn´t see him when she left her office, far over midnight. Turning on the lights of Cameron´s table, House sits down in her chair, his finger playing with his cane. He´s imaging her, letting the memory of the past hours passing him by. Leaning back, his eyes found a piece of paper, lying rumpled down on her desk. He grabs it, reading its full text. Nothing rare, a simply class reunion. Slightly disappointed he tosses the letter away, thinking about the moment he came back to his office earlier. At first he didn´t saw her. Until a soft, hardly to recognizable moan filled his ears. Looking to the right, he saw Allison Cameron sitting there in the dark, completely drawn to a world only she knows.

The moment he saw the thin immunologist sitting there, alone and looking painfully fragile, he knew that it was happening again. Allison Cameron was once again fighting with unseeing demons and unhearing voices. He knew who would lose the battle. Sometimes he wonders. He wonders if Cameron was thinking, believing, that he wouldn´t become aware of the inner fights she was doing on some days. Days like these. He knew every sign of it. The dark shadows under her eyes. The lost of sleep and weight. Her stiffened Body. The lost of that sparking in her eyes, replaced by an almost unbearable hunted, frightened look.

He knew all the signs and he knew what it did to her. But he didn´t know _what_ was doing it to her. Himself calling the master of puzzles and showing no mercy when it was time to put the cards out on the tables, House became fiercely about finding out her secret. But as time did go by, he wasn´t sure anymore that he would scream her little secret out to the world the minute he would discover it. Because in all that time, trying to figure out the demon that chased Cameron, he learned that this all wasn´t about a simply lie or a made mistake. In fact, the deeper he followed and watched her, the more he got frightened. And at this Point, when angst touched him, he knew that he was right from the beginning on. Allison Cameron _is_ damaged. But not the way he thought. It was way over that. And this realization made House to clench his teethes. He wasn´t that sure anymore that he wanted to know what happened to the young doctor, causing her so much pain and leaving her damaged beyond repair.

End of chapter one, but not of the story. I just want to add that the whole story is completely made out in my mind and that Im going to _finish_ this story. There´s nothing I hate more than a good story remaining unfinished. (Not that Im meaning my story is good…you know…I hope it is, but…uhh…) And then, of course: Please, review and keep in mind that I still need a Beta!


	2. Chapter 2

**Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.**

Author's Note: I do not own House, M.D or Hugh Laure or Jennifer Morrison or…or…

Chapter Two

Softly closing the brown front door and leaning against it, Allison Cameron felt an incredibly rush of joy that this day was coming to an end. Pressing down the urge to vomit, she inhaled deep and slowly made her way to the bedroom. Not caring that she still was wearing her office cloths she lays down in the bed, grabbing the warm blanket and covering herself up. Shooting a last glare at the clock radio on her nightstand, she briefly wondered how long the ghost of her past would follow her this time. Five days since she got that invitation. It should go better. It _always_ got better after the first days. But this time, it wasn´t. It was going worse. She only hoped that the next morning would bring some recovery.

Fiercely trying to avoid any body contact, being grateful that they had no patient with a mystery illness to treat, Allison Cameron almost lost her control when House intended to put her down to his clinic duty. Sitting in his chair, making little circles in the air with his cane, he smirk's at her.

"No." A single word, filled with such an unmistakable refusal, that House almost lost his sneaky grin.

"What? Did just say…no?" Speaking slowly and acting like he had a little, naughty child before him, Cameron tried to stay calm, repressing the growing need to slap him. Slap him hard.

"Yes, I said that. And there is no, and I mean _no way_, that I´m doing your clinic duty. Go, find another fool."

"I was not asking you, Cameron. You didn´t get that, riiight?" A new wave of pain rushed through his leg and House was getting impatiently with his little duckling. Cameron, obvious unimpressed by his now more demanding words, only looked down at him before shaking her head.

"No." And with that she turned around, heading for the office door, abruptly stopping and looking back to a puzzled House. "And one more thing; make sure that next time you go through my belongings, you clean up the mess you make. You are getting a little unwary."

It took House several seconds to recover from her statement. Closing his dropped jaw, House raised one of his brown eyebrows.

"And, are you going to your class reunion?"

Heavily breathing in and out, Cameron once again is turning around.

"No, I´m not going."

"Why not? Could be funny, you know?" Standing up, pointing his cane at her, House smelled a chance to gain a piece of another puzzle from the brown immunologist.

"Are you going to all of your reunions?" Her voice withholds a tone he can´t interpret. Peeved? A sign of unseeing fury, maybe?

"No, God spare me to see all that ugly asses again." Making a grimace to her, he joggles his whole body.

"See?"

Turning on the lights in her small apartment and looking over to her answering machine, Allison Cameron sighed. She knew wich voice would speak to her the moment she pressed the button. Grabbing her mail and going through it, while sitting down on her couch, a yellow envelope catches her eyes. She almost drops it. Slowly reading the sender she lets out a more hysterical sound. Now it was getting _that_ bad with her. It was a letter from the Hospital in New York, the one she landed in after the police had found her. Every year they would send her a questionnaire. About her health, about the **after effect** and … Throwing away the letter she turns on the TV, trying to focus on something else.

_All her pleadings didnt helped her. He had put her again in that dark hole. Cameron could hear his footsteps, right over her. He was cleaning the mess they had made when they were fighting. At least, this time he hadn´t enchained her, like the first time. Her lip was hurting, and touching the burning skin she could feel the warmth of her blood. She slightly wonders how long she would have to endure the darkness around her. After Jared had put her the first time into this hole, it took two days before he let her out, still leaving her bounded a few hours more, not trusting her. Granted, the first day she landed in there was going by a little easier, given the fact that she was slowly recovering her consciousness. _

_The moment he stood behind her, slapping her in the face with his fist, Cameron lost her balance and dropped to the hard floor. She could hear his words before she slipped out and the world became black. "The cat catches the rat." _

_If she could, she would have laughed at his word. He was the rat. He had lied to her, all this time. He was the one who turned out to dealing with drugs. Not she. And she found it out, only to get caught by him. Now, trapped again in this little hell of darkness, she don´t know of what she should be more afraid of. The fact that they were on a boot, miles away from anybody, from help or the realization that Jared still thought that everything would going on as it was. That Cameron still would be happily his girlfriend. And that freaks her out the most. He wouldn´t let her go. He made it clear. Very clear._


	3. Chapter 3

Author´s Note: Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.

Author's Note: I do not own House, M.D or Hugh Laure or Jennifer Morrison or…or…

Chapter Three

Letting out a painful cry and sitting up on her coach, Cameron found herself back in to the reality, leaving her nightmares behind. Within seconds she manages to turn on all her lamps, frantically trying to banish all the darkness that is enclosing her apartment. Running her shivering hands trough her wasted brown hair, leaning her forehead against the mirror in her bathroom, she is too afraid to look at herself. She always thanked God that the reminding scar Jared left is on her shoulder bone, almost unseen to her. But right now, it´s almost as if she could feel the cool top of the knife, cutting slowly into her soft flesh, leaving trails of blood. Losing the rest of her strengths, Allison Cameron collapses on the floor, quietly crying. Hours later, escorted by the morning sun, she finally comforts herself into the leftover pieces of a safety.

She is late. Too late. Again. Yesterday, she stepped way after midday to the work, looking sleepy and somewhat ill. Greg House is banging, unnoticed to himself, his cane in to the blue carpet, the fleecy fabric catching the sound of it. Slowly he was getting anxious about Dr. Cameron. She´s not the person how would come late, two days in a row, without leaving a message. And, after all, the whole being late thing was his territory, right? He didn´t need an enemy at this. He would have to make that clear to the young doctor. Having made this decision he catches his coat, leaving his office.

It´s not going away, he is not going way, regardless how hard she tries to ignore him and his knocking cane. Pulling the white Pillow over her dizzy head, Cameron tries unsuccessful to escape the peeving sound coming from her front door.

"Cameron! I know you´re there! Your car is standing outside, and your Neighbor said that you haven´t leave yet. He´s a little bit curios, hu?" He leans is ear on the door, barely hearing her answer.

"Go away, House. Not feeling very well. Headache. I take a day off, kay?" Every word caused her tortured head a new wave of pain, leaving her even more nerveless.

"Great! I´m a doctor, you know? Give me a look. I could prescribe you something."

"No."

House was getting short-tempered. Headache! Ha! He didn´t believe her. A Headache was never a reason for Allison Cameron to take a day off. No no, there was something more to it; the never stopping curiosity in him could smell it. And he wanted to know what it was. Now.

"Open the door! Don´t make me angry, or I have to tell Cuddy that you are trying to escape your clinic duty. I do that; trust me, I´m that yucky!"

"Please, just go away." Her voice gets angrier, letting House grin.

"Want some of my Vicodin?"

Now he could hear soft footsteps, coming toward the door. Slowly open the door a little, immediately leaning against the doorframe to stop the spinning, Allison Cameron is facing Greg House.

"My…" House blinks his eyes, making sure that it was the young immunologist standing right before him. He never thought that one single night could chance the appearance of somebody that badly. Cameron just proved him wrong. The color of her face was meeting with the white of her way to big sweater. Her hair is ragged and her eyes surrounded by dark, almost black curls.

"Told you that Im not feeling good. Now, go and leave me alone." Her words almost a whisper, her eyes fighting to stay open, Cameron couldn´t say more.

"You look like creep, you know that, right?" Was that worry in his voice?

"Thanks. Now, just go. See you tomorrow." Turning around a little, her sweater is slipping a little down and leaving her right shoulder bare, giving House a good look. Before Cameron even could react and cover her shoulder up again, she feels a warm hand on her upper arm, grapping her tight.

"What the fuck is that?" He can´t believe what he is seeing. A large scar, almost as big as his hand, looking startling like a "J".

Before he could say more, Cameron frees from his clutch, shut´s the door and leaves him completely haggard, speaking last words through the closed door.

"If you ever touch me again like this, I will kill you."

Sitting in his office chair, listening to his iPod, House remembers his last encounter with Cameron. Her appearance had frightened him more than he would admit in the first place. But after seeing that awful scar, he couldn´t ignore his angst anymore. It´s the forms of that scar that freaks him out the most. There was no way that an accident could have caused this. No. It was made by a person, no doubt. He shivers a little, hearing her last words in his mind.

"_If you ever touch me again like this, I will kill you."_

He believes her. She meant every word of it.

The puzzle called Allison Cameron was becoming even more difficult for House. More…frightening. Looking at his table the invitation from her High School catches is eyes. "Milborne High School" the title says. He was getting a feeling. Maybe that whole invitation thing was more important than he first thought. Cause looking back, it all started the minute Cameron received it. Sometimes the smallest and unimportant things are turning out to be the key.

Limping to his computer without his cane, starting the explorer and typing the name of Cameron´s High School into the Google, he quickly finds the Website of the school. Clicking through the site he finally finds what he was looking for. A site about the upcoming reunion, a list of all the people that had visited that year. Some even with pictures. House was almost disappointed that there was no photo of the young Allison Cameron. Could´ve been interesting. Scrolling down he found somewhat of a memento to the already deceased class members.

And while looking at the pictures, House is not aware that he misses something. That he, the Master of being able to see the smallest and weirdest connections, is overseeing a big lead. Maybe it was because this time, it was beginning to get personal for him. He was losing his objectivity.

He didn´t pay attention to the picture of a certain Jared Carter, smiling warmly, a strand of his blond hair falling in to his blue eyes. He didn´t read the words under the picture. The same words Jared Carter wrote in the yearbook.

"Allison, maybe next time we can get our Date. Nobody knows what the future is holding. I look forward to see you again someday. You never know how much."


	4. Chapter 4

**Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.**

Author's Note: I do not own House, M.D or Hugh Laure or Jennifer Morrison or…or…

Chapter four

Suppressing an upcoming Flashback of Jared touching her on the same place, hurting her with his grip Cameron covered her upper arm with her left hand, suddenly feeling House´s hand as if the burning touch of his smooth skin never had ended, still lasted. She briefly wonders how his hand would feel when it touches her face, leaving warm traces on her cheek. On other times, in a other world, she would have craved that touch coming from him. But this time, in her now exploding world, touching her was the worst thing he could have done. She almost feels as if it's happening again.

Cameron is very aware that she couldn´t blame him really. How could he know? But at the other hand, he just could have left her when she was asking to do so. Or, much better, never showing up in the first place. Shit. She still feels his fingers on her skin.

But that wasn´t the biggest problem she now had to deal with. He saw the scar. Out from all people, Greg House was the first person, except for the hospital stuff back in New York, who ever saw that evidence of her past. She even can´t think about the remarks he was going to throw in here and there. The whole hospital stuff would probably know it by tomorrow. Oh, fuck it. Fuck him. She spend years of making sure that nobody would learn about her past and now one single moment had destroyed it. He had destroyed it. Screw him.

There was no other possible left. She had to end it before it was starting. She couldn´t endure it again. Once a lead is discovered, the other would follow. And she knew what was coming next. Either they would stare at her in disbelieve, wondering how she made it through it, sending her looks of mercy and offering her a helping hand. Other would take a step away when she´s passing them, looking at Cameron like she were some freak, some monster. A murder. Wich, in her mind, she is, no matter how somebody would twist it, trying to convince her that she wasn´t.

No. She had to end it. Grabbing her phone she picks up the number of Lisa Cuddy, M.D., Director of the Plainsboro Hospital, telling her the decision she had made.

"You stay away from her. No more home visits, no more digging in to her private live. You just stay away from her. You understand?"

Lisa Cuddy always despised Greg House´s habit of plunging his noise in to things that were out of his business. But given the facts that his curiosity had saves many of his patient´s life's, she accepted it, trying to oversee his bad mannerism. But this time, he had gone too far.

Looking down at him, her arms crossed and not in the mood to take any smirk comments from him, Cuddy just hoped that this time, he would listening to her. Not waiting for an answer she speaks again.

"With no more digging I also mean that you won´t Google her school past anymore. Are we clear about that, House?"

"You looked in to my computer?" Raising an eyebrow at Cuddy, House seems somewhat amused.

"I did. Any problems with that?"

"Yes! I thought that you were against all the snooping in things that don´t belongs to you. But it could be me, you know. Maybe I get it wrong."

"Sometimes there are circumstances that forces you to make things you don´t appreciate. Now let me say it again and for the last time; stay away from Dr. Cameron. This is not some of your puzzle you have to solve just to be the one who knows it all."

Giving him one last glare Cuddy is turning around, heading for the door, when his voice stops her.

"Didn´t thought that it´s that bad." His voice is quietly, missing the usual irony.

"Excuse me?"

Looking at Cuddy, House gestures with his hands at her.

"You come all the way to me, visiting me at my house, throwing threats to me. You could have save that that till tomorrow." His eyes locking into Cuddy´s, House let out a small sigh.

"Listen, House. She wants to leave." Seeing the shocked look on House´s face, Cuddy soothes him.

"I could persuade her to stay, at least a few more days. She has to clear her head before she makes such a decision. That´s why I´m here. I gave her unlimited Holidays, but knowing her tells me that she may shows up at work. And in this case, I don´t want you near her. Well, not that way."

"You know!" Standing up and walking toward Cuddy, House looks closely at her.

"Know what?" Trying to look innocent, Cuddy raises one of her dark eyebrow at him.

"You know what´s behind this. The whole matter with Cameron. Don´t lie, you suck at it."

Breathing slowly and finally breaking the eye contact, Cuddy nods her head, affirming House´s suspicion.

"Yes, you´re right. I know what´s up with Cameron. But don´t try to make me tell you it. I won´t, no matter what you try."

"Since when do you know?" House can´t believe this. How could Cuddy know, and he not? Was he getting that bad?

"From the start. And that´s all you get from me. I´m not telling you more. Good Night, House."

Following her to the door, House has no intent to let Cuddy go that easy.

"Wait! You can´t expect that you can come in here, giving me some mysterious words and…"

Turning around angrily, almost running into House, causing him to take a step back, she cuts his speech.

"Stop it, House!" She´s on the top of screaming at him, her face holding a mask of impatience and anger.

"You stop it, right there. Haven´t you got it by now? Then let me be clearer to you: Dr. Cameron is under my personal protection. Everything you do regarding her, you also do it to me. Stay.away.from.her."

"I saw the scar." Let´s see how much she really knows. But Cuddy´s answer once again surprised House, leaving him even more distracted.

"I know. And don´t you ever dare to mention it." Giving House a soft look, Cuddy decides to give him some truths. Maybe this would stop him.

"Look, House. It´s bad, you know? Really bad. And with you, digging in it? You make it worse. Whatever it is that Cameron has to deal with, she has her reasons not to tell the whole world."

"But you know." It was more a statement than a reproach.

"Yes. And you know what? Sometimes I wish I didn´t. It´s hard to know something you always thought only happens in a bad movie or book. And it´s even harder to know someone who had experiences it."

Finally leaving him alone with these last words, House stands in his Living room, unable to move. He never saw Cuddy getting so fiercely about a person.

"_It´s hard to know something you always thought only happens in a bad movie or book. And it´s even harder to know someone who had experiences it."_

House knew many bad movies. Many bad books. He understood what Cuddy was trying to say. He really understood. And if this was that awful, whatever it was, he understood another thing.

The person that laid a finger on Allison Cameron and leaving her that broken should better be death by now. If not, it maybe would have to be his turn.

This suddenly thought frightens him. Since when did he became so fiercely about a person, especially without knowing the truth behind all this?

That's what they say. The psychologist´s. They say that every fragment of your memory is collected in your brain, orderly sorted. The brain keeps it all, never forgetting a piece. But there are differences. Neither can remember their early ages. Even though your brain hardly can give you the memory of your first years of your life, your brain is holding it. They say that the first five years of your life is playing a determining role for your character. And then, there are the other differences.

Your brain, your subconsciousness. You only can take things up to a certain level. The moment you get in to a situation that´s overcharge you, the moment they decide to keep it from you. They are deciding to erase it from your reachable memory. They do it to protect you. To keep you alive. They lock it into a drawer and won´t let you in until they decide so. And that´s not until they think you are strong enough to do so. That reaction of the brain and subconsciousness has saved many lives in many ways. Sometimes, it gives rape victims time to recover from the body injuries before they have to deal with their memories. Of course, having absent pieces in your memory is a big thing to deal with. You don´t know what happened. At a specified point you only have this big black hole, wondering what caused it. Your brain won´t tell you, cause you´re not ready now. But living with these black holes, it can drive you crazy. It´s causing your fantasy to suggest you the worst.

Knowing all this and being on the medicine side, Allison Cameron always tried to accept the decision her brain made. But being able to remember the most time she spend with Jared on those last days, she always tried to recover her lost memory. She couldn´t think of any possible situation that would have caused her brain to block it out from her. Not given the things she could remember.

_Her head is hurting. Her whole body is hurting. Slowly opening her good eye, she is tortured by sun light. Wait, sun light? Last thing she knew was being in that hole, hearing him cleaning up the mess. Hearing him leave. Then, slowly, it comes back. The sliding door is opening, giving Cameron a look at Jared´s feet's. His hands are coming down, holding something white. A hanky. He´s pressing it on her mouth. She´s too weak to fight him. She´s getting tired, so tired…_

_Where is she? Car. She is in a car. Suddenly she sees him. He´s outside the car, talking to someone. Help. This someone could help her. But she can´t speak. Her tongue won´t move. Panic creeps her as the stranger walks away without even looking at her. Can´t he see that she needs help? The driver door is opening. _

"_Hello, sleepy. For a moment I thought you would never wake up again. That I gave you too much." Leaning forward, Jared is kissing her forehead, touching her cheek. Sickness overcomes Cameron. Why can´t she move? Can´t push him away? He smiles at her while catching a single tear that is sliding down her face. _

"_Shh, don´t worry my darling. No need to cry. I won´t hurt you unless you´re not fighting me. You fight me, I will hurt you. Okay?" Not awaiting an answer, Jared starts driving, singing to the music coming out from the radio. _

_Eventually he stops the car in the middle of nowhere, only trees enclosing them. He leaves the car, walking to Cameron´s side, opening her door. Without saying a word he gently grabs her, taking her weak body and starts carrying her through the never ending loneliness. Her head is rested on his shoulder, her face burrowed in his neck. And all she could do was letting him carry her away. From help. From her life. From everything._


	5. Chapter 5

Author´s Note: Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.

_Thanks to Taxless and Drewbie875 four your comments, gives me a happy feeling..._

_Please keep doing it!_

Chapter Five

She promised it to Cuddy. And promises, Allison Cameron held. So since giving the older women her word, Cameron tries to find out what to do next. After taking almost a whole bottle of ASS in 24 hours (the doctor in her knows that she almost gave herself an overdose), her headache was slowly getting better. The voices and strange faces from the TV fill her apartment with pleasant noises, even though Cameron is not paying any attention to the movie.

She still has to listen to her answering machine, the left messages growingwith every hour. She´s persuading herself to walk to the little table standing in the floor. To walk over there and press the record button. Such a small thing to do and such little energy to actually do it. Winning over her listlessness, Cameron turns down the volume of her TV, giving the speeches from the band her ear.

Uncle Tom wants to know what to do about swollen feet's. And where did they come from? His wife, Aunt Mary, throws in that "the girl" has more important things to do than to think about his ugly feet´s and making a diagnosis through the phone.

Samantha, an old friend from the college, is telling her with a loading voice full of joy that she´s going to marry. That causes a little smile on Cameron´s lips. Some good news finally. She would have to call her back. Tomorrow.

Cameron is not surprised to hear Lisa Cuddy´s voice, but she´s caught by what she says.

"Cameron. I want you to know that I talked to House. I think you´re save now from his visits." A pause, then: "And I have talked to Dr. Tiek. I think you should go to her. She´s a very good trauma psychologist. You really should speak with someone." Another pause. "You can´t do it alone, Allison. You need professional help. Call me back or even better, visit me at my office."

With that, Cuddy hangs up, leaving Cameron stunned. She knew that Cuddy was right with every word. She couldn´t do it any longer alone. In fact, she always knew that someday she would have to work up her past. But she always hoped that she could do it on her own. Even the imagination of telling another person all the things, Cameron felt the urge to vomit.

Since she turned down the hospital psychologist back in New York, she never visited another. Not because she is sharing the diffused notion that only crazy people go to therapists. No. As a doctor she knew very well that sometimes, your body can´t heal when your soul is ill. Sometimes you need someone who guides you through the darkness, back to the light. It´s what she tells many of her patients. But living that long in her own darkness, Allison Cameron is not sure that there still is light for her. And even if, where to take the energy from to walk down that road?

He´s not getting any fun out of this. Punching down Chase and Foreman, forcing them to make his duty clinic, it´s clearly not making fun these days. Something missed. Sipping on his coffee cup, he immediately spits out the brown liquor. Wich son of a Bastard was trying to poisoning him with this…this stuff? Thinking back he has to blink. He was the one making the… coffee this morning. Sighing he gets up, making his way out to the hospital floor, searching for a coffeemaker and scaring away the doctors and nurses with his evil facial expression, his cane helping him.

Passing Cuddy´s office and finally finding a coffeemaker, House suddenly stops in his motions. Slowly limping back, he sees her, just standing up from the chair she was sitting. Interesting. Allison Cameron was back. Or was she? Of course she was. She was not here to quit, right? Feeling somewhat of angst rushing through his chest, he quickly searches for a **hiding place **as Cameron, escorted by Cuddy, leaves the office. Both women looked sad, some could even think that they had cried. Noo. Cameron crying? Yes. But Cuddy, crying, in her office? Nah. Looking closer he studies Cameron. His heart pulled together a little. She still looks like a freaking ghost. Even more, if possible. Helpless. She looks helpless, painfully fragile. And he knew; at this point, she is The direction the woman are walking surprises House. They were not heading for the exit. Instead of they stop before the elevator, pressing the button that´s leading to the sixth floor. Sixth floor? House has to catch his breath. That´s where the psychiatry section lies.

The elevator door opens and swallows Allison Cameron and Lisa Cuddy, leaving House behind. Looking over to the stairs, he begins to swear. Damn, damn leg! Screw it! Fucking shit! As fast as his hurting leg let him, he rushes over to the elevator, banging against the metal while waiting for the door to open. Of course he wouldn´t admit it, but fear has met him. You just don´t go that easy to the psychiatry. Right, he was there, doing somewhat of a withdrawal treatment, but this was a completely other story. But Cameron going there, escorted by Cuddy? Every time he thought that he knew just how badly Cameron´s mental health was, he got teaches better.

Eventually the door opens and House got his chance to follow them. Screw Cuddy. To hell with her threats. Cameron didn´t needed to be locked away. He was not sure what she needed, but locked away with a bunch of crazy people certainly wasn´t. And he would make sure that this wouldn´t happen.

Taking a road she´s not sure where it will lead out, Cameron once again feels reminded of Jared. Amongst fear and anguish, ignorance had always guarded her. What would happen next? Of what idea he would come up next? What was he planning? But this time, there was a different. SHE was making the decision to take a train wich end station she´s not knowing. It doesn´t help her, though. She´s almost sure that she won't say a single word to Dr. Tiek. But at least, she gives that whole thing a chance, right? And maybe it leaves her alone from Cuddy.

Looking over to Cuddy who smiles slightly at her, Cameron enters the office of Amanda Tiek, specialized trauma therapist.

Dr. Tiek is looking up from her files on the table, smiling warmly while studying Allison Cameron, M.D. Standing up and going over to her she shakes Cameron´s hand, feeling the cold laying on the skin.

She gestures at a chair while introducing herself to the young doctor.

"I´m Amanda Tiek. Trauma therapist. But," waving her hand in the air, "you already know this."

Cameron is not sure what to say, so she only nods. Damn it!

D. Tiek smiles, feeling the obvious indisposition coming out from Cameron. She even could sense her nausea.

Taking in the bad appearance of Cameron, seeing that only a few left halters kept the women together, she replays the record she had read earlier, giving in from Dr. Cuddy.

It had surprised her, being in that job almost 20 years, to find out that Dr. Cameron never took any professional help and still was able to keep herself together that well all this years. Even despite the fact that the missing treatment now demanded his prize, it only proved Dr. Tiek that Allison Cameron was a very strong person.

Having read the reports from the hospital in New York, the files from the police, she knew that she was facing a very complicated case. She at least expects several untreated traumas, along with they´re symptoms.

Looking down to Cameron´s file she over reads the words she had marked earlier.

Abduction by own boyfriend, Jared Carter, drug dealer. First trapped on a boot. Several days kept in a little dark room under the deck. Drugged and protracted to several other location. Several failed escape attempts. Every time Beaten up after.

That was only the first list of the happenings, and while reading it at the first time, Dr. Tiek quickly came to the conviction that Jared Carter was a sociopath. Wich frankly was the only reason that Dr. Allison survived in the first place. Cause ripped apart between his business´s and his love for his girlfriend**, and in his own, twisted way, he really did love her, Amanda Tiek has no doubt about that, **Jared Carter did what most sociopaths would do: He tried to keep both, now matter what it´s cost.


	6. Chapter 6

Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.

Author´s note: Wow, this chapter was hard to write. I had massif problems to get my thoughts on paper, and I´m not very pleased with this. But eventually I decided to stop overwrite it, not wanting to make this worse. I work as a nurse in a nursing home and had a double shift at the weekend, along with not having one single free day since January (half of our staff is laying down with a bad flu), so I guess I´m just…a little tired and that´s the reason this chapter was giving me the creeps.

Now, I leave you to this chapter and hope for your mercy while I´m going to enjoy my free evening. A 21 old girl wants' to have some fun here and there… :D

**_drewbie875:_** Actually, I´m working to make a career out of my writing. Always wanted. Let´s see if this dream comes thru some days...

**_AllyCameron:_** Aaah, finally a german fan! Yeah! Wenn das nicht rockt, dann weiß ich auch nicht weiter...Danke für dein Kommentar, ich hoffe ich höre weiterhin von dir!

Now, I leave you to this chapter and hope for your mercy while I´m going to enjoy my free evening. A 21 old girl wants' to have some fun here and there… :D

Chapter Six

Leaning against the wall and carefully looking around the corner, House detects Cuddy, standing alone in middle of the floor, talking to her mobile phone. But no sign of Cameron. Leaning more forward so he can see the rest of the hallway, House loses his cane, causing it to land on the white ground, the sound of it spreading around the station. Kneeing down he fishes the cane back to his possession and slowly stands up – only to meet some brown eyes gazing at him, obvious full of steps. Uh-oh. Pointing a finger at House while coming towards him, she shakes her head.

"I can´t believe it! What the hell you think you´re doing?"

"What the hell are you think you´re doing?!" Imitating Cuddy House points his finger at her chest, leaving her speechless for a moment, giving House the time to talk further.

"You heard me, Dr. Cuddy. Go on, answer me. What are you thinking?" His voice gets louder while giving her the evil eye.

"What I´m thinking? I…House, what are you talking about?" His words are a mystery to her, even more than else.

"I talk about this!" Waving his hand around the floor, House moves nearer to Cuddy.

"I talk about you" again he points a finger at her, "dragging Cameron herein! You think locking her away will help her?"

"Lo…Locking her away? House, are you now completely insane? Where did you get that from?"

"Hm. Good question. Where did I get that from? Maybe because I saw you two going up here? Going up to the psychiatry? And the fact that I can´t see Cameron anymore with you?"

Cuddy shakes her head, looking somewhat disappointed at her old friend and colleague. "And that leads you to think that I put Cameron permanently into this place?"

"Exactly. What else should I think, hu? Now, tell me where she is." His demanding voice almost causes a smile to Cuddy´s lips.

"What the fuck is so funny?"

"You. You are funny. And disappointing too, but that's another thing. But looking at you, hearing you´re charges and seeing you so protective over another person…it´s funny, you know. One could think that you´re hiding some feelings for Cameron."

"Bullshit! I just don´t wanna see one of my ducklings vanish in the psychiatry, causing me to hire a new stupid doctor. That´s all." He hopes that this convinces Cuddy.

"Right. Whatever. And now, calm down. Cameron is right there," she points to the office where Cameron is in, "and is talking to Dr. Tiek. At least, I hope she is." Looking absently to the closed door, Cuddy stops a moment in her speech before turning her attention back to House. "Whatever, the point is: She´s only here to see a therapist, not to stay here. Get it?"

"Oh."

I was as bad as she thought it would be. The whole conversation was escorted by disgust and nausea filling the air, almost sizable. Cameron has not decided yet what to think of Amanda Tiek. She was kindly, looking understanding. But considering her job, she has too. Can´t welcome a patient with a rude face, right? After spending almost an hour with the therapist, Cameron thinks that she didn´t said much more than "yes" or "no".

Dr. Tiek wants to see her again tomorrow. Obviously Cameron´s discretion wouldn´t stop the therapist. Cameron sniffles while thinking about that. She´s not sure whether she should go or not. She remembers seeing her file on the table, getting a strange feeling to see her past summarized on a few papers. Knowing that Dr. Tiek had read it. Cameron shivers. Another person who knows.

After leaving her office she visited Cuddy again, telling her in a few words about the last minutes, though not letting her know about her even raised doubts. She could see the relief in the eyes of the older woman and Cameron understood the meaning behind this. Though Cameron always insured to Cuddy that there was no point in feeling guilty, Cuddy always tried to make it up by helping her since it happened. Beginning with paying the hospital bills back in New York and hiring one of the best trail lawyers to get her out of the jail.

Of course the police had first accused her of being Jared´s partner in the drug business. It didn´t mattered for them that she was more death than alive the moment they found her. By the time her lawyer handed them the hospital report they quickly dropped this suspicion. You can´t ignore a medical report that screams "Victim!". Still, she had to face the fact that she had murdered him, even if it was in self-defense. But after freed from the suspicion of being a drug dealer it was easy to prove that he had abducted her, causing the fatal end. The evidence was undeniable.

As for Lisa Cuddy, even after helping her out of all this, the guilt still stayed, and Cameron is well aware of this.

Sighing, Cameron lies down on her couch, blankly watching the movie on her TV, still not having figured out what to do about the meeting with Dr. Tiek.

"I´m glad that you decided to come. I had my doubts." Amanda Tiek smiled at the younger women sitting before her.

"They were warranted. Look, I don´t know how to do…this." Maybe truth could help her.

Dr. Tiek nodded, smiling a little. "I understand. It´s never easy. But you just made a good start by telling me what you think about this."

"Its not easy." Not easy? Oh girl, that´s not even near to describe your feelings.

"Then let me help you out. I make you an offer. I ask, you answer. And if I´m asking something you don´t wanna talk about, just say it. You don´t have to answer to anything that you don´t want. How does that sound to you?"

"Good, I guess. But I´m not sure that I can give you many answers considering the list I don´t wanna talk about." Cameron looks down to the ground, not sure where to look at.

"That´s okay. We´ll just wait and see."

Leaning back in her chair Dr. Tiek is considering where to start the best, where to make it the easiest for Dr. Cameron.

"When was the first time you met Jared Carter?"

Taking a deep breath Cameron thinks back, already feeling the ghosts of the past coming back.

"In High-School. We were in the same class. He even sat next to me." A haunted smile.

"And what kind of relationship you two had?"

"Mmhh. Not sure. I…he…we…liked each other. Some sort of teenager love, I guess."

"Anything happened? A Date?"

"Once. But I didn´t showed up." Cameron remembers sitting on a tree, smoking a cigarette, thinking about the meaning of life, too scared to go to the Date she had with Jared, though not knowing why at this moment. Maybe she should have recalled her insecurity years later.

Seeing that Cameron remembers something more to this question but won´t tell it, Dr. Tiek just became her first clue of how to act. She would only question simple things, nothing that would cause the immunologist to talk about her feelings or related reminders. Something the woman was clearly not ready to do, but that is not surprising the therapist. Step by step.

Taking another direction Dr. Tiek throws in another question.

"Let me ask you another thing, just to have more insight. Is it right that Dr. Cuddy was related to Jared Carter?"

A deep breath, a little pause, and then:

"Yes. He was her half-brother."

Miles away from Dr. Tiek´s office, House is sitting on his couch in his place, looking down to the papers in his hands. And then, after a small moment of uncertainty, he starts reading through the past of Dr. Allison Cameron.


	7. Chapter 7

Author´s note: Like I said on my LJ Site, it sucks to read that there are a lot minor grammatical mistakes that makes it diffucult to read the story smoothly. I know that something like this really can destroy a good story, and I want to give you guys a good one. But it´s good to know so I can learn from my errors. Mmmh. **I really need a Beta. Anyone?**

Chapter seven

Almost an hour. Cameron starts counting down the minutes. Her second session with the therapist was finally coming to an end. Cameron is not quite sure, but the older woman before her seems to have a hard time to recover from the "he-was-Cuddy´s-half-brother" thing. Not unsurprisingly. Sometimes it even seem odd to her. The voice of Dr. Tiek is cutting through her thoughts and causes Cameron to look up.

"So, you never saw Jared again until the class reunion?" While asking Amanda Tiek makes a note in her notepad. _Often deflected. Very thoughtful._

"Ah, yeah, that´s right. Not until."

"You wanna tell me about?" A little step toward the beginning, a cautious try to break a little hole in the shield Dr. Cameron is holding.

The only answer was silence.

"Dr. Cameron?" The voice of the therapist is soft, almost a whisper.

"Not sure. I don´t think that it is important. " She really believes that. Well, at least she is trying to believe her own words.

Dr. Tiek slowly shakes her head.

"But it is. That´s where you two renewed your relationship. That´s where it started."

"Oh, so than that reunion is the core of it all, hu?" Immediately, Cameron feels sorry for snarling at the therapist, but Dr. Tiek only smiles a little, writing another note down. Anger always is a good sign.

"I wouldn´t say that it was the… core as you say, but I do think that you can´t over walk that reunion. Without you going there, you two never would have met again." She studies the young doctor, waiting for her reaction.

"What´s that supposed to mean? Without you going there, you two never would have met again? You saying it´s my fault?" Anger rises in Cameron. How could that…that…women even indicate that?

"Do you think that this all was your fault?"

"No! Of course not!" This time, Cameron lies fully conscious to the therapist. Screw her and her damn questions!

"Good. Cause it wasn´t you´re fault. Nothing of this." Another note to her pad. _Guilt._ Looking up from her notes, she makes another try.

"So. You wanna tell me?"

_The soft silk of her blue Dress slides along her legs, ending on her ankle, almost making contact with her white shoes. Her hair is pinned up, a single strand falling down on her neck. Slowly, she moves toward the big brown door with his two glass plates. Suddenly remembering the hundred times she went through that door in her early youth, Cameron almost feels old. Looking closer, Cameron smiles. Gosh, there still was the breakage on the left side of the glass, right beneath the doorknob! _

_Making her way through the door and entering the hallway with his bright walls, Cameron hears the music coming from the end, seeing the opened door of the dining hall._

_She barely had entered the hall when a shrill voice calls her name and two arms are forcing her into an embrace, leaving Cameron almost crushed._

"_Allison Cameron! Gosh, you here!" Finally a face shows up, giving Cameron the chance to recognize the women who had attacked her. Oh no, Melanie Parker, the cockiest person she had ever met. _

_Melanie closely studies Cameron. "You dress really is…lovely!"_

_Ah, lovely. Now that's a compliment! _

"_Thank you. So is yours." Help. She needed help before she…suddenly, a voice comes from behind her. _

"_Lovely? Melanie, as always you are understating the truth." First only seeing a shadow in the corner of her eyes, slowly a man approaches her, finally showing his whole stature._

_Oh boy. Jared Carter, fully and incarnate. Her heart makes a little jump. _

"_In fact, Melanie, I think that this dress is one of the gorgeous out here." He smiles while leaning a little further into Cameron. "And I even don´t wanna talk about the look of the woman who wears it." _

_Laughing, Cameron heaves a hand to stop him from making any other compliments. "Are you trying to make my face red, Mr. Carter?"_

_Noticing that she was not welcomed in this conversation, Melanie Parker turns on her heals and leaves the two of them alone, but not without making a little sniffle to show her harmed pride._

"_I think we just chased THE Melanie Parker away." Jared´s eyes are sparking with amusement. _

"_Yes, I have that feeling too. Thank you. You´re rescue came in the right moment." _

_Jared widely laughs, causing little dimples on his cheeks, sending a little shiver into Cameron's body. He then looks closely at her, waving his head to the exit._

"_Shall we escape that whole reunion?"_

"_Absolutely." Lying one of his warm hands on Cameron´s arm, the two leave the hall, the school, and the other classmates. _

_And while walking along the streets of their old Hometown, Cameron and Jared talk about the past years, sharing their stories, both feeling the old attachment. _

_Way after midnight Jared escorts Cameron back to her hotel room, kissing her softly before leaving her alone. Closing the door behind her, Cameron smiles. Tomorrow would be a good day. _

"That´s it." Feeling tired and exhausted, Cameron rubs her eyes.

"He seems like a nice guy, hearing that. Charming, funny. " Amanda Tiek is pleased. A good start.

"Yeah. Someway he was in the first place." She wants out, leaving the office and memories behind, catch some fresh air.

"Mmhh. I can image to fall in love with such a guy. In fact, that´s some sort of a man I would fall for."

That surprises Cameron, leaving her puzzled.

"What I mean is that it´s not a crime to fall in love with someone, who seems to have a good heart. You never know what really lies behind the appearance a person is giving you. And even if the person turns out to be not that nice, there´s no point in accusing yourself for falling in love with him in the beginning."

Finally leaving the office of Dr. Tiek, Cameron tries to hold herself together, not allowing the past hour to bring her down.

At first, she didn´t saw him standing there. She was too lost in her own world. But then, his cane catches her eye, bringing her back to the reality. Looking into his face Cameron almost drops her car keys. Within seconds, she understands. His face says it all.

He knows.

House almost waited since half an hour before the office of Dr. Tiek. He didn´t sat down, he just kept standing there, noticing nothing around him.

The moment the door opened and Allison Cameron left the office, he just gazed at her. And then, after seeing the shocked look upon her face he limps toward her and touches her face gently.

"I´m sorry. So sorry."


	8. Chapter 8

Author´s Note: As always, thank you for you comments!

Chapter eight

He touches her. She feels his hand on her cheek, leaving warm traces on her skin. It almost feels good to her. Almost. She takes a step back, holding her breath, gazing at him disappointed.

"Don´t touch me, House. I thought I made that clear."

"Cameron I…I wanna talk to you." His voice is pleading, his eyes holding the same expression. He made a mistake and this time he got screwed. He knows, and Cameron knows.

"About what? Wanna explain to me how you get my file? Was it good to read it? Did it make you happy, hu?"

Still gazing at him Cameron can´t believe that he would have done such a thing. But after all, he still was Gregory House.

"Im sorry for reading it. Believe me. I…"

"No. I´m not buying anything you say. I´m not interested. Your action said it all. Hey, why don´t you go home, grab yourself a bottle of Vicodin and scotch and read my story again?" Now she smiles at him, almost looking amused.

House can´t believe what he is seeing. She smiles! What the fuck was wrong with her? Suddenly, an odd feeling is rushing through him. Something about Cameron´s reaction is strange. Thinking about it, his suspicion even grows. Wait a minute. How could she have known that he had read her report? He hadn´t say a word about that. As if she…

"How do you know?" His eyes are full of disbelief.

Again Cameron smiles and this time, it nearly made House sick.

"I really thought that you were smarter than that. I even thought that you, for once in your life, would stay out of someone´s business." Shaking her head Cameron takes a deep breath.

House remains silent, slowly getting a hint of what Cameron was going to say.

"Let me tell you something. The file you´ve read, the file you obviously stole from Dr. Tiek's office? Wasn´t mine. Well, not really." Cameron savors the confused look on House´s face. He deserved it.

"What?" He can´t say more. This all was too weird, even for him. What sort of bad movie he was in?

Cameron takes a step toward him, her warm breath touching his neck, her eyes nearly black. She´s not sure how far she can go. How much of the truth she can admit without making him even more curious. She has to find a middle way.

"It´s faked. A cover story." Dangerous field. She has to be very careful of what to say.

House jaw drops. "A cover story? You mean everything in that report is false? That" He lowers his voice, suddenly becoming aware that they are still in the psychiatry "you wasn´t raped?"

"Right." Well, sort of. "Listen, House. I spend years of making sure that nobody discovers my past, and I have several reasons for that. Well, as much as I wish, I can´t ignore the fact that you get interested in it and that you would begin to snoop. And knowing that you once stole the report of Stacy, don´t look surprised, I know what I had to do. I won´t let you destroy something that I build up so hard."

"What´s really behind this?"

"Nothing that concerns you."

"He read it?" Cuddy´s voice sounds a little deeper through the phone than usually.

Sitting in her kitchen, looking out of the window, Cameron nods, aware that Cuddy can´t see it. "Yeah, he did."

"I can´t believe it. I really hoped that he would stop. What did you tell him, anyway?"

"Some truth, some lies. But I don´t think that I convinced him to stop. I´m afraid nothing will." A single tear slides down her cheek but she´s not noticing it.

She hears Cuddy´s breath, synchronous to her own.

"Allison, I think we have no other choice than to tell him."

"No! We´re not going to tell him!" Fear overcomes her.

"Wait. I didn´t mean that we´re going to tell him the whole story. Just…the dangerous part of it."

"We can´t involve another person into this."

"I´m afraid House already involved himself. He won´t stop snooping until he gets what he wants. We can´t risk him to get you discovered. And he has to know that he plays on dangerous ground before it all gets worse."

"I can´t tell."

"Then I will." Cuddy stops a moment before speaking again. "I know it´s hard for you, but I need you to trust me."

Hanging up the phone several minutes later, Cameron just sits there, unable to move. When did this all get so wrong? When? Why? Wasn´t it already bad enough? Without House?

Maybe she really should go. Leaving all this behind. Run to another town, start a new life. A new life with the same old secrets, the same old ghosts. But there would be no House chasing her.

No. It was senseless. She was sick of running away. She already spend too much years of her life doing that. And here, she had Cuddy, covering her up. Someone who helped her. In another town, she would be on her own again.

And thinking back to her session with Dr. Tiek…she´s not that sure anymore that there was no hope for her. Maybe, just maybe, there was a way out of her haunting memories. She said his name, said it loudly out, even told the therapist about the reunion, and the world still existed. The world hadn´t exploded right over her head. But still, only the imagining of telling the doctor about the abduction, the acts of violence he did to her, the knife cutting into her flesh…all along with his gently words, his never ending professions of love to her…

Standing up she makes a tee, once again trying to banish his words out of her mind, her soul. Her headache was coming back.

A hard slap on his shoulder wakes House. Looking up, he sees Lisa Cuddy, her facial expression unreadable. Turning around Cuddy sits down across him, only his office table standing between the two doctors.

"I´m here to tell you something." The sound of her voice is strange to him.

"About Cameron?" He still hadn´t get over the whole conversation they had in the psychiatry. So many questions.

"Yes. And I want you to listen carefully."

Looking into the eyes of his old friend, House knows that this time, Cuddy wasn´t here to threaten him again. The Cuddy before him wasn´t the same that stormed into his House that night. So he only nods, preparing himself for her words.

"Years ago, Cameron had a relationship with a guy. They were a couple over almost a year. Someday, something went bad. I´m not telling you what. But it did. And it turned out that this guy was a drug dealer with connections to the Italian Mafia. After everything was over the police accused Cameron of being his partner. Of course she wasn´t. The police believed her eventually. But there still was the Mafia. Maybe they would think that Cameron knows something that could endanger them. So the police made sure that her real name never showed up in the reports and that nobody learned the real person behind the alias. They even came up with a faked report to explain why Cameron was in the hospital at this time. One Detective even thought about getting Cameron into the witness protection program, but she wasn´t a principal witness, so…"

For once in his life, Gregory House didn´t know what to say at first.

"And the guy? What happened to him?"

"He´s dead."

He liked the darkness. It gave him the feeling of pure safety. Looking around his office, only seeing the shadows in the room, he smiles while turning his attention back to monitor of his Computer, smiling warmly at the picture on the display.

Even after all the time, he never got over the fact that this all was so easy. So fucking easy. You need a way out? A new identity, a new life? No problem. Especially not when you´re with the mafia. It only took them hours to get him out of the hospital; make a donation here and there to some Detectives, some doctors, and the whole story was complete.

They even arrested his precious Cameron for a crime she never committed. Ah, well, she did, but not in this way.


	9. Chapter 9

Author´s note: Ha. He. This chapter took a while and it´s a little longer than the others. I didn´t get much comments on the last chapter, I hope this one will bring some of the readers out of the dark, telling me how they find this little one here. Good? Bad? Tell me! And, if all goes good, this is the last chapter I will post without a Beta having seen it before you. crossesfingers

Song Lyrics: BLACK HEART FROM A-HA

Chapter Nine

……………………………………

**I never saw sunlight  
Burn as bright  
I never felt darkness  
The way I feel it tonight  
**

**But I never felt darkness  
Like I feel it tonight  
Little black heart**  
**……………………………………**

She knows the peeving sound of his cane crashing into her front door well enough by now. Oh, why would he never do what she wanted, hoped?

She also knows that ignoring him wouldn´t impress him a second. Worse, he only would take this as a challenge. But Cameron is too tired, too weak to battle him right now. The sooner she would open the door, the sooner he just would vanish.

While once again preparing herself to face Gregory House, she opens the door.

The brown cane stops in his actions, and remains motionless in the air, only hold by a hand. Before she even can see his face, he squalls past her, entering the apartment. What the…

"I just can´t believe it!" His voice is on the top of screaming. He limps toward her couch, letting himself fall on it, looking furious at her, his eyebrows almost making contact with his burning eyes.

Closing the door behind him Cameron is about to yell back at him for "burgle" into her private place when something stops her. Opening her door again she looks into the dark floor while an uncanny feeling is taking over her But, no, nothing there. Nothing more beside her angst. For a second she could have sworn that…

"Cameron?" A worried voice cuts through her thoughts, remembering her of House´s presence.

"Hu?" Did he spoke to her? Of course he spoke to you, Allison. You see any other person here? Get your head straight! Now isn´t the time to freak out!

She turns around to him, an answer already on her lips, as she once again finds herself stopped.

This time, it is a slightly disturbed Gregory House who within seconds stands beside her, peeking through her loophole.

"House, what are you doing?" His action seem weird to her, even considering that it was House.

His voice echoes against the door. "Making sure that everything is okay."

This leaves her astonished. _Making sure that everything is okay?_

Suddenly he turns to her, his whole posture tensed, his now dark eyes looking inexorable at her.

"What did you see?" It is more a request than a question.

"I..I" What now? What was she supposed to say? How could she escape his scanning eyes?

"I don´t know. Maybe a shadow and…"

"And a shadow causes you to freak out like that?" His eyes tell her that he don´t believe her, and right now, she´s not in the shape to lie at him. So she decides to be honest.

"Fine. I thought that I had seen someone at the end of the floor. But as you can see…"

"So you saw someone?" His questions nerve her. What the heck he wants from her?

"Oh, stop it. It was just a shadow, alright?" She raises an eyebrow, her hands stemmed on her hips. "So. Wanna tell me what you want from me? How often I have to say that I want to be alone?"

House, his weight supported by the cane, looks down at his feet.

"Cuddy talked to me some hours before." He goes back to her couch and sits down, waiting for her to say something.

"I know." She had thought about this confrontation since her telephone talk with Cuddy. Thinking about how to react, what to say, hell, what to do. She didn´t came up with an answer.

"Can´t you just forget it?" She lowers her voice "Please?" How she hates to beg.

When he shakes his head, she´s not surprised. But his words do it.

"No, I can´t. This whole thing is nothing you just can erase from your mind. " He looks up at her and his voice holds a soft tone when he speaks again. "Cameron, why don´t you come over here and sit down so we can talk?"

"No. I want you to go."

"But I won´t."

Suddenly, her own weakness irks her. Here she stands, in her home, the only place where she feels safe, strong, and she can´t fight House. But she should be. She can´t allow him to take away her left strength. Not here, not yet. She remembers the last words Dr. Tiek said on this morning.

"_You have to fetch back your life. And for that, you have to fight."_

Now was a good time to start with that. She´s sick of being the weaker one. The harsh sound of her voice sends a jolt into House´s body.

"Enough!" She points at him "Enough! You go, now! You grab that silly cane of yours and then you limp out of my apartment as fast as your third leg will allow you. Or," she lowers her voice "do I have to help you?"

He´s so shocked at her speech that he only can repeat her question, with a dumb expression on his face.

"Help me?"

Cameron takes a step toward him, her face almost red, and her left hand now sticks into House´s chest.

"Yeah, helping you. Wanna know how?" Her voice is almost a whisper now.

"I´m not sure." What the hell was happening here? Who was this woman before him, and where was Cameron?

"Oh, never mind, I´m telling you anyway. Let´s be honest, House. You´re a cripple. Think it´s that hard for me to bring you from you´re good leg? And when you lie down, I will drag you out of my apartment – on your ears."

In this moment, looking at a very angry Cameron, feeling her finger on his chest, hearing the fury in her voice, House understands. He sees behind her mask. And what he finds there is pleasing him.

"Nah," he waves a hand at her "you would never do that."

"Wanna see?" She gets impatient.

"Come on. Look at you! You are nothing more than a line in the landscape. One big gust and you fly away. You just too weak to…"

"I am not weak!" How could he dare to even think that? Bastard!

"Pfft! You actually believe that? What lets you think that? Cause I really can´t see you not being weak. Have some examples for me?"

"I defeated him!" Oh, no, no, did she just spoke that out loud? Dear God…

House stands up, his body almost touching hers. He sees the anguish in her eyes. It is nearly too much for him to bear.

"Defeated who?" He whispers, his hand clutches painful his cane.

She intends to move away from him and the warmth coming from his body, but his free hand gently grabs hers, not letting her go. She can´t stop the word coming out of her mouth.

"Jared."

Jared. A name for her ex-boyfriend. A name behind the tragedy that had stroked her. A name for the…wait.

Jared. The letter "J". The scar. My god, this sick Bastard.

It´s then when he just takes her powerless body into his arms. He feels a single tear sliding down his neck. But he is not sure whether it´s coming from her or from him. And it does not matter.

……………………………………………

**You say it's getting better  
You say it's allright**

But I never felt darkness  
Like I feel it tonight  
Little black heart  
…………………………………..

He looks at the picture. Both women on it are looking in the direction of the camera, not aware of being watched. They are both beautiful, though in different ways. One is catching the eyes of a man with her obvious strength, the other with her more hidden. Though both women are thin, delighted with a perfect body, they have a different appeal on a man. He would never accuse his half-sister Lisa of looking fragile, but he would say that to his Cameron. He even once did. But she´s not fragile, he knows. Hell had no fury like her. And she was his fury. She ever was, and she will ever be. Too bad that Cameron hadn´t recognized that fact back on the boat or, in the end, in New York. Now she would pay for her ignorance. Pay for being away that long. And this time, she would not escape him. He made sure of that.

He can´t wait to touch her silken skin again, to kiss her again. Only a few more days.


	10. Chapter 10

Author: ksyd  
Rated: M  
Pairing: a little Cameron/House  
Summary: Rubbing her right shoulder blade, feeling the scarring line that wetted her soft skin with the letter "J", she got up and packed her things, forgetting to take the invitation with her.

Author's Note: I do not own House, M.D. I just play a little.

**I wanny say a big THANK YOU TO to my wunderful Beta Kate, who did a really amazing job on this chapter! **

Haunted Chapter ten

The morning sun shines onto her beautiful face, making her look younger, almost light-hearted, but the dark circles under her eyes tell another story. Her head is resting against the arm of the sofa and her eyes are closed, as her chest slightly moves up and down.

The scent of tea fills the air and House is gently moving, not wanting to awake Allison Cameron as he limps about her kitchen. He liked the way she has furnished her apartment; nothing here seemed at all girly. It was more…simple. Comfortable, but simple. Even in her bath (and this had really surprised him) he only found the necessary things.

He goes back to the chair he had rested in last night, only a few feet away from Cameron's sleeping form. He hadn't slept. He could not, and he hadn't wanted to. He´s almost certain that Cameron hadn´t slept peacefully in days and he had watched her through the entire night. He had seen every shrug or stirring; had heard every moan and whisper, though he hadn't understood what she'd said.

After taking her into his arms they had stood there in silence for several minutes, neither of them wanting to let go. Cameron had moved first, trying to avoid his gaze. Neither of them had known how to act, or what to do next. He still could see the anger in her eyes, could feel it. He didn´t like that expression; it showed too much of her pain, but it still was easier to bear than her frightened, tortured look. He had taken off his coat and walked into her kitchen, trying to find something to eat. But an empty fridge was the only answer, so without really even thinking about it, he had left her apartment, rushed into the closest shop and came back with two full bags of food. While he cooked something for her to eat, Cameron sat silently in her living-room. She finally had given up trying to scare House away.

He didn't tell her when he later put some narcotic into her tea. That woman had to sleep or she would collapse. So after forcing her to eat he had brought her the fluid, waiting for her to fall asleep. The moment her eyes began to get heavy, she had glared at him, pointing her finger with a scared look and a shocked face toward him. And for a moment he had regretted going behind her back, but he knew it was for the better, so he set that feeling aside.

"You little…did something in…what?" Then her words had faded and her eyes closed.

As he had covered her body with a blanket, he had sat down, his thoughts going back to his conversation with Cuddy.

"_Years ago, Cameron had a relationship with a guy. They were a couple for almost a year." _

He was only surprised by the fact that this guy…_Jared_…had been her boyfriend. He had always figured that whatever had happened to Cameron was… well, he didn´t know what he had thought. Almost a year, so it was likely a serious relationship. It had to be. Cameron's not an easy girl. So she had loved that guy.

"_Someday, something went bad. I´m not telling you what. But it did." _

Something went bad. What? There are many things you consider as "went bad", so what did she mean by that? But at that moment, he hadn´t thought about that scar on Cameron´s shoulder bone. But now, with knowing the Name of that little Bastard? He was beginning to put the pieces together. The "J" obviously stands for his name. And he had engraved it into Cameron´s skin. But why? And how could a human being do something like that? Something so cruel?

"…_And it turned out that this guy was a drug dealer with connections to the Italian Mafia**."**_

A drug dealer. That caught him off guard. Cameron´s boyfriend was a drug dealer and with the Italian Mafia? Boy, that´s a crazy thought; apparently the son of a bitch was through and through an evil person. For seconds he had wondered how Cameron could have possibly not realized that fact in all the months she was with him. His brain quickly continued on to realize she probably had, and her discovery had led to all the things that…"went bad".

"_After everything was over, the police accused Cameron of being his partner. Of course she wasnt. The police believed her eventually."_

That one almost made him laugh. Not the after-everything-was–over-part, but the thought of Cameron being a drug dealer. Yeah! Allison Cameron, the most honest person he ever met, was secretly a lying, cold-hearted woman. But he didn´t know under what circumstances the police had found her, so he probably can´t blame them for going this way. What really got to him was the first part of this sentence. _After everything was over._ Replaying those words in his mind, House became frightened again. Over. What the hell was over? And why did the police show up in the first place, accusing Cameron of being involved in Jared's business? This only could mean that the police found the two together after…"everything was over".

"_The police believed her eventually. But there still was the Mafia. Maybe they thought that Cameron knows something that could endanger them._ _So the police made sure that her real name never showed up in the reports and that nobody learned the real person behind the alias. They even came up with a falsified report to explain why Cameron was in the hospital at the time."_

That had made him sick. Even to think about the danger she was in…And now he knew why he had read a report that had led him in the wrong direction. And if he had thought better about that report, he wouldn´t have missed the simple fact that there was no consideration of the scar at all. Now he understood Cameron´s mysterious words and her strange actions at the psychiatry ward.

She wasn´t only hiding her past, she was protecting herself, and she had good reasons to do so. Though Cuddy didn´t say it aloud, he knew why she had told him some of the truth. His researches could endanger Cameron and him, but right now, it wasn't himself he was worried about.

The morning sun brings him back to the present, along with a little moan from Cameron, who was still asleep.

He wonders what Cameron was like before. Before bad ghosts and haunting memories began following her. Before angst could touch her. He remembers the little conversation they had when Foreman was fighting for his life.

"_How do you know that you´re not infected?"_

"_Do I seem happy to you?"_

"_Never."_

Chase had laughed about House´s response, and he had felt the urge to strangle the Australian.

He´s almost sure that some of the strong ideologies Cameron has are a result of the experience she had with that guy. He can no longer blame her, its probably her way to deal with all this. And it definitely was the reason for her desire to speak the truth. One lie had destroyed her entire life.

He tries to imagine another Allison Cameron. One who would laugh more? One who would be a little more cheerful? One who had a happy spark in her puppy eyes, not that sad one?

He wants to know that Allison Cameron. And maybe, but just maybe, he would be able to.

He looks at his watch. Cuddy would already be waiting for him. Clinic duty. Sighing he stands up. Grabbing a piece of paper he starts writing down a note for Cameron. When he puts down the pen, he goes to her, touching her face softly and lightly kissing her forehead before leaving her apartment.

Cameron opens her eyes, still feeling the touch of his hand on her cheek, feeling his lips on her skin. She can´t put into words how she feels about that. About him. About his caring actions. She´s so lost in those thoughts that she almost didn't notice his touch hadn´t freaked her out. Instead it had felt good. Maybe the light was slowly coming back to her. Maybe she would tell Dr. Tiek about that thought in their next session, later that day.

"I think someone was in my office. I don´t have any evidence, but I think that someone has gone through my stuff." Dr. Tiek looks, sitting across her, at Lisa Cuddy who sighed when she heard those words.

"Is something missing?" She almost knows the answer.

"No. But some of the some of the files were not at the same spot I left them in yesterday evening." Amanda Tiek was shaking her head slowly as she spoke.

Cuddy nodded, unsure of what to do about that. This had never happened before (well, beside House stealing Stacy´s file), and with no evidence and nothing missing…But she believed the therapist.

"Do you have any idea what the burglar was looking for?" _Let´s hope for the best_.

After a brief pause, Dr. Tiek nodded.

"Yes. I think someone was looking for Dr. Cameron´s file. Not for the report, but for my own records about our sessions." The pen in Cuddy´s hand drops to the table. "Beside her I have two other patients and I don´t think anyone would have an interest in their problems, which are rather…normal, and they are already some months into therapy, and nothing had happened, ever."

"But the record wasn´t there." It better not have been, cause if…but the therapist before her does not let her down.

"No. I am not keeping Dr. Cameron´s record with the others'. I store it away together with the original report. And that´s in my safe. At my home." Dr. Tiek had never asked any questions about the two files Cuddy had given her. After reading the original, she didn´t need to. The words and the circumstances they described spoke volumes.

A soft knock on the door breaks off the conversation and both women turn around – to see Cameron.

"Oh, I didn´t want to disturb you. I´m sorry. I come back later and…" Wait a minute, something doesn't seem right here...

"What is it?" She knew that expression on Cuddy´s face. It meant nothing good.

Cuddy decided to be honest with her. Cameron had the right to know.

"Someone broke into Dr. Tiek´s apartment tonight. And she thinks that this someone was looking for your file."

Oh no. NO. NO. NO. It can´t be. This all had to be a mistake, a…

"Maybe it was House." Cuddy´s voice cuts through her thoughts.

Cameron only shakes her head slowly. "No, it wasn´t him. He was with me last night."

The shocked look on Cuddy´s face almost makes her smile. Almost. If the circumstances where anything else.

"And with that, we have a problem." House´s voice surprises the three women. And his facial expression almost frightens them. It held blank anger.

Damn that stupid bitch of a therapist! She had stored Cameron´s record somewhere else. He only found the faked report, but he already knew what that one said. It was a rape report.

He giggles, remembering some of Cameron´s word through their last days together. He had made love to her, all night long, but afterwards, as hell broke loose once again as she tried to fight him, she had called it rape. Rape! This accusation had made him angry and he had lost his patience with her. It was too much for him. First she had gone behind his back, trying to escape from the house there were in. He had caught her, just in time, and she had started to fight him. It was no problem to overpower her, it never was, but he was deeply hurt by her betrayal.

"_Why are you once again destroying everything? After we spent the whole night making love to each other? I thought that you had come to your senses." He comes toward her, causing Cameron to take a step back, only to find the wall behind her. She shakes her head._

"_Rape. It was rape, not 'making love.' I was too weak to stop you, too weak from the drugs you gave me yesterday morning in order to bring me here!" As soon as Cameron's words come out of her mouth, she instantly regrets them. _

"_What did you just say?" Anger rises in Jared´s eyes, leaving Cameron more frightened than ever before. He now stands right before her, with his arms pinning her against the wall. She can´t speak, too shocked that the words had slipped out. _

"_I asked you something." His voice cold as ice, his eyes burning dangerous. It was too late. There was nothing she could say now that would calm him down. Her voice nothing more than a whisper, her whole body shaking, she answers him. _

"_You took advantage of my weakness. You may be calling it 'making love,' but it wasn´t. I had no other choice than to… sleep with you. It was rape. And I **despised** every time you touched me." _

_His fist comes down hard against her face, sending her to the ground, leaving her barely conscious. Feeling the pain in her face, touching her cheek, Cameron once again sends a prayer that something, someone, would stop him. But experience had shown her that nothing would, and playing nice with him wouldn´t help her this time. _

_His hand grabs her forearm, forcing her to stand up and to look at him._

"_Then why don´t we do it all over again so you can show me **exactly **what you mean, honey?" _

No, he had never hurt her in that way. A rape was something else, like that one in the faked report. But he never, never, forced her to sleep with him. He always had left her with a choice, in many ways. Every time he had to hurt her, every time he was forced to punish her, it was because SHE had made the wrong decisions. And, no matter how hard he tries to see it like Cameron, he can´t understand her accuse of being raped by him. She wasn´t enchained, could have leave the bed every time, but she choose not to. And Jared Carter truly believes that, easily overlooking Cameron´s attempts to not make him angry. She was too afraid to stop him, so she had let him.


	11. Chapter 11

Author´s note: I do not own House M.D. I just play a little!

I´m very sorry for the late update, but first I had some big time trouble´s to write this one, and then the computer of my Beta wouldn´t upload the edited .doc file so she could send me the file per mail. But now, it´s all done, and here we go. (And Chapter twelve just needs to be edited, so it should be here in one or two days.

As always, I love to read all the sweet and beautiful comments you people leave, don´t stop doing that, it lets me write faster!

Thank you **Katie**, you´re a great Beta! Don´t stop!

**Chapter eleven**

**Hope.** One single word, with one thousand interpretations. For Lisa Cuddy, it had taken on special meaning the day she´d met Allison Cameron, her half-brother's girlfriend. She had liked her; a beautiful, smart, young woman who obviously had made Jared happy, something she had wanted for him for years. Not that he had been…unhappy before, but she had always seen his lack of true happiness. The moment Cameron had entered his life, Cuddy could basically see the empty places inside of him were replaced with love and joy. Because of that change, she had hoped her brother would stay out of any further trouble. His problems had never seemed very extreme, but were rather... normal for his age. At least that´s what Cuddy had told herself. But maybe she had just not wanted to face the possibly that her brother had a more unstable personality; the way he was bent on getting whatever he wanted, at any cost often lead him into trouble. He got into fights when he had too much to drink, once he had even been arrested for stealing a car with one of his friends. After that encounter with the law, it had seemed that Jared was coming to his senses. That´s what Cuddy had hoped. He had left town and hadn't shown up for months, occasionally leaving messages on her answering machine. Then one day he came back with Allison Cameron, a young medical student. For Cuddy, hope had won. Until reality hit her, smack in the middle of her surprised face.

She had never mourned him. She couldn´t. Not after seeing the truth; after learning what kind of man her brother really had been. After seeing all the lies he had built in front of her, all the damage he had caused. And certainly not after she had seen Cameron, lying there in the hospital bed. Her left eye had been almost black, her lips rough, her shoulder covered in white bandages, and her soul torn apart. New hope had risen within Cuddy. The hope that this young woman would heal. Someday, somehow. She still has that hope, and she refuses to let it go Now, looking at Cameron, she is also hoping that this was all a mistake. Hoping desperately that nobody was searching for her record.

**Disappointments. **Jared Carter carries several of them on his sleeve. From the day of his birth until this very moment, he had experienced so many. One bigger than others. The knowledge that his father always had pushed him away, and had truly cared only for his first family, was one of the bigger disappointments, but he had learned to live with it. He had started to find the attention his father wouldn´t give him elsewhere. In High-School, he was known as the guy who could provide everything. He was the first source, and he had craved the attention the other kids had given him. His sister Lisa disappointed him too, but that was almost not worth mentioning, considering all the things she had done for him when he was young. She always had been there for him, trying to make up for the mess their father had made. But that doesn´t mean it doesn't hurt him. He sees that she helps the one woman, the one person, who disappointed him the most. But maybe, he shouldn't blame her for it. After all, she doesn't know his side of the story, only Cameron´s. His feelings are always divided when it comes to the relationship Lisa and Cameron have. If it weren´t for his sister, Cameron probably would have ended up in prison. And in prison, she would have been out of his reach. Just the thought of that makes him sick. Through the last four years he had been following every step, every single move his Cameron had made, still feeling the burning taste of disappointment.

But he wasn´t angry with her. Not anymore. When they met again, he wouldn´t give her another opportunity to betray him. Of course he had to hide in the shadows, to watch from a distance, but he had his people, old connections, who would follow her for him. All this time, he had been very careful, making sure that the heads of the Mafia, the ones who got him out, did not discover his actions. But now he was no longer one of the little guys; his good work was finally being rewarded. They gave him his own branch in the big business. And with that, he was free to take a certain person to join him. And this time, he'll be sure she doesn't disappoint him again.

Jared moves quietly, not wanting to cause unwanted attention from the neighbors, as he opens the door and enters the Allison Cameron's apartment.

**Expectations. **Gregory House simply never had any. Not as a child, not as a teenager or young man. He expects nothing from no one. Maybe he started to have expectations when he had met Stacy, when they had a relationship, though he never knew what kind of expectations they were. That they would be happy till the end of the world? That they would start a family? No, even when he was so much in love that it had hurt, he never got that romantic, and he couldn´t break his walls. And maybe that´s what really had destroyed the relationship with Stacy, beside her betraying behavior when he had lain in a coma. She even admitted it in their final conversation. She had felt alone, as if he no longer was there for her. Hearing that had hurt, but what had Stacy expected? She knew that he was a cripple, soul and later body. After they had parted for the last time, he found out that he wasn´t deathly disappointed. Cause he was free of expectations. As a child and even as young man, he always tried to fulfill his father's expectations, but eventually he realized he never would be able to. It was never enough, so he gave up. And, House was always (almost always) honest to himself; not having any expectations means that nothing can disappoint or hurt you, so it was a safe way to live.

But now, standing in Cuddy´s office, he looks over to Allison Cameron, noticing her stiffened body, almost _feeling_ her angst, and he expects cuddy to get her little sweet ass up and do something. Or he would.

**Truths and lies. **Allison Cameron once thought that she knew the different between lies and truths, that she could see the truth in people's eyes. She was wrong. She would never admit it, but House was right when he said that "Everybody lies". But she would never stop searching for the truth behind the lie. She still searched for the truth in Jared´s lies; So many things he had said to her, so many promises and confessions. Where had the truth stopped and the lies begun? She didn´t know, and probably never would. She is only sure about one thing. He had loved her, a creepy, sickly love, but he had loved her. And maybe that´s the biggest lie of all. Though one lie had destroyed her whole life, she never could accept their existence. Or that human beings would just lie and lie without even thinking about it. Why, why are people doing this? Can´t they see the damage they cause? The hurt in the eyes of the loved one? Don't they understand that a lie can break a heart?

Now she stands in an office full of people who know the truth behind _her_ lie (well, besides House), and their faces held the same expression as hers; shock.

The white wall clock above the closed door ticks quietly, soothingly. For several minutes neither woman speaks. Both are still trying to fully recover from this morning's news the shock has not quite gone away yet. Dr. Tiek speaks first. Her voice, though soft and gentle, sounds like a scream in the office.

"You want to talk about it?" The question irritates Cameron.

"About what?" _About the weather, maybe?_ _Geez, Cameron, don´t get ironic here. _

"Maybe you want to talk about this morning, about my suspicion."

"No. No need to." Dr. Tiek shoots her a skeptical gaze, causing Allison Cameron to cringe a little in her chair. What is it with this woman? Why is she always making her nervous, uncomfortable? How? Yet she's sitting here, and she's come back every time. It's frustrating.

"Really. There´s no need to talk about that. Look, to be honest, I think that the whole thing is being overvalued. Even _if_ someone was here last night, that doesn´t necessary mean that my file was the target." _That should have been clear._

"But it looks like it was." When she hears that, Cameron almost rolls her eyes at the therapist but decides against it. She moves forward a little, now almost sitting on the edge of the chair, looking directly into Dr. Tiek's eyes.

"You have to _understand_ something. I have had to live with the…the past for four years now, and I try my best to hide it, not to get any attention, to stay out of the danger to get detected. I have enough to deal just with that. I just can´t _allow_ a single freaky event to get me frightened. That would make me crazy." Dr. Tiek listened to her speech with interest, it confirmed her original suspicion.

"So you _are_ frightened?"

"Didn´t you heard what I just said?" _Jesus!_

Dr. Tiek smiles, though it´s more a sad one. "Oh, I did. And I don´t believe you."

"Pfft!"

Cameron is still angry when she parks her car outside her apartment. That stubborn woman! She didnt believe her! She wasn't sure which made her more furious; That Dr. Tiek wouldn't buy her lie, or that she got caught telling it. Of course she was frightened, but she could deal with it alone. Just as she'd been doing all these years. Meanwhile, darkness had relieved the daylight, and Cameron just desperately wants to climb into her bed, pull the blanket over her head, and forget about the world.

Finally closing the door behind her, throwing her shoes aside and walking to her bath, she almost overlooks it. But as she turns on the water to take a shower, she stops mid-motion, turning her head a little to the right side. And there it was. Right on her bed. She almost screams but her throat won´t let out any sound.

Slowly, with her hands on the walls, she goes back to the living-room and grabs her phone from the table, looking around nervously while dialing Cuddy´s office number.

"Nunnery New Jersey, you are talking with pastor House. How can I help you?" _Huh?_

"H…House? What are you…where is…is Cuddy there?"

"Cameron? Is that you?"

"Where´s Cuddy? I…I need to talk to her. Now!"

"What´s wrong? Did something happen? You sound upset."

"_Please_, would you please just give me Cuddy?" A sound, coming from her kitchen, catches her attention and she turns around to see what it is.

"Cameron?"

A loud crack.

"Cameron! Are you still there?"

Another crack, a little moan.

"Cameron! Talk to me! What´s happening over there?"

But silence is the only reply.


	12. Chapter 12

Author´s note: I don´t own House. I just play a little.

Ha. No time trouble with this chapter. I hope you guys like it, and don´t forget to leave a comment!

**A very special Thank you to Katie, my Beta!**

Chapter twelve

"_Cameron?" _

_A loud crack._

"_Cameron! Are you still there?"_

_Another crack, a little moan. _

"_Cameron! Talk to me! What´s happening there?"_

_But silence is the only reply._

House replays his words and her silence over and over as he drives to her place, not giving a damn about all the traffic regulations. His first thought had been to call the police, but then, it had seemed too dangerous for him. He had then called Cuddy, quickly telling her about Cameron´s phone call. Now both were in their cars, racing to get to Cameron, and they already knew Cuddy would arrive first.

"Cameron! It's Cuddy! Open the door!" _Come on girl, just open the damn door!_

The brown door flies open, showing a very angry and yet frightened Allison Cameron.

"A fucking cat! Can you believe that? A baby black cat attacked me in my living-room!" her voice breaks as she speaks.

"A cat." Cuddy is about to let out a relieved sigh, when the haunted look on Cameron´s face stops her.

When entering the apartment, she sees a bundle of black fur lying on the couch. "How did the cat get in here?"

"I don´t know. Maybe I left a window open and she slipped in. Must be. But that´s not why I called, Cuddy." She pauses, gazing in the direction of her bedroom. "There is something else. And if I wouldn't know that…there _has_ to be a simple explanation for this, I would have freaked out by now."

"What is it, Cameron?" The elder woman sees the direction Cameron is gazing. "Something in your bedroom?" When Cameron nods, Cuddy walks toward the room and enters, followed closely by the younger doctor.

Cameron points to the middle of the room. "Right on the bed. The dress." She sees Cuddy´s puzzled look and shakes her head. "Right, right, you can´t know. Well, this dress…I´d bought it during a vacation with…Jared and he´s the only one who ever saw it. I never wore it again." Cameron sighs, looking down as she continues to speak. "What I'm trying to tell you is that I didn´t put It on my bed."

Cuddy turns around surprised, closely studying Cameron´s face. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. And as I said, there´s only one reason why I haven´t freaked out yet. Your brother was the only person who knew about this dress. But we can…debar him. He can´t be the one who put it there. So this whole thing has to be…I don´t know."

Cuddy´s voice is almost a whisper as she speaks. "You mean that this", she points toward the bed. "can´t mean that they've found you?" _It better not mean…_

Cameron nods. "Right. No reason to pull out that dress. Nobody knows about it. And besides that, let´s be honest Cuddy. If it where the Mafia, I would be dead right now."

A hard knock on the door startles both woman and Cameron is the first to catch herself. "That´s House. I Know that sound by now."

The second she opens the door House is inside, looking around attentively. "So, what´s going on?"

"It´s…" _What's she supposed to say? That a cat attacked her? _She looks over to Cuddy, searching for help.

"Hell-lloo, " He snaps his fingers in front of Camerons face. "I asked you something!"

The three of them are sitting on the couch, every one gazing blankly at the table before them. House´s cane is going up and down on the ground. "Can you please stop that?" Cuddy´s voice cuts the silence, but not House´s actions. She stands up, walking around the living-room.

"Something else that seems strange to you?" He turns his head to the side, facing Cameron.

"No. Just the dress."

"And the cat. I looked, all windows are closed." Cuddy responses.

Now House stands up, going into the kitchen. He opens the fridge, and looks in the sink. As he limps back he looks at Cuddy, then Cameron.

"Cameron, have you eaten something since this morning?"

"No." _Was this his only worry?_

House nods when he sits down on a chair, his face covered by an unreadable expression.

"Thought so. But there's food missing in the fridge, and there´s a dirty plate in the sink. And I washed the dishes last night."

Both House and Cameron avoid the amused look on Cuddy´s face. "That´s interesting."

House waves a hand in the air. "Whatever, I was up to something. If you didn´t eat something, then who did? And what about the cat? Cuddy said that all your windows are closed. So how did it get in here? And then your dress. You said it wasn´t you who put it on your bed. So again, who did?"

And after a small pause, House asks a last question. "And by the way, who did say that your charming Boyfriend is really dead?"

It was getting better and better. First Cameron´s puzzled look when she saw the dress. Then her frightened face when she walked back to the living-room, grabbing her phone. And it obviously wasn´t Cuddy who took the call.

Ah, and then, the cat. Little black cat. And the look on Cameron´s face when the cat attacked her!

When his sister Cuddy had entered the scene, he got a good look at her puzzled and frightened face too. And when Cameron said his name, he almost couldn't stand it. It was so good to hear his real name after four years, and it was even better coming from his little girl.

It was a really good idea to put that dress on her bed. At first he was surprised that she had kept it. But on the other hand, why shouldn´t she? He was hurt and disappointed when he had searched through her belongings, only to find out that Cameron had thrown away anything that was related to him. Even her year book! But it was all right, there would be plenty other things in the near future to keep.

And then, this House came in. He growls. _House. _Who was he to assume the right to be near _his_ girl? He even dared to touch her arm! Fucking Bastard! And did he say that he had spent last night at Cameron´s? He would have to pay for that. Jared hoped that Cameron hadn´t…_slept _with him. 'Cause then she would have to pay, too.

This son of a bitch's last sentence made him smile. Ah, finally! Someone was going in the right direction! He zooms in on Cameron´s face, enjoying the shock filling her beautiful face.

_Yeah, that´s right my Love. Your man is back. _

And neither House, Cameron nor Cuddy are aware that the little camera, covertly hidden in the floor lamp, is telling Jared Carter every move.


	13. Chapter 13

**Haunted chapter thirteen**

Author´s note: I don´t own House. I just play a little.

I´m so sorry that it took me two weeks to finally post this chapter! Im just hoping that I haven´t lost too much readers because of this! Is just that the motherboard of my computer said goodbye, and it took me a while to get a new one. And then, I had to write this chapter again, almost all of my data is gone. So I hope that this chapter, (including the cliff-hanger, he he), will be worth the long wait! Please comment on this one, I really want to hear what you all think, especially now, cause with this chapter, the story goes into a race of new happenings that will lead to the big final. So please, tell me your thoughts!

**And, I can´t say that often enough, a big THANK YOU to my Beta Katie. You´re just...amazing girl. **

"No. There is no way that he's still alive." Cameron surprises both House and Cuddy with her calm and steady voice.

"And you know this because…?" House looks over to Cameron who still seems shocked, but he´s not sure if this was because of his statement or the earlier events. Probably both.

"Because I know. He´s dead, trust me." She looks him right in the eyes, her facial expression unreadable to him.

"Yeah, I get that now. You´re sure that he is dead. But let me ask you again; _what_ makes you sure of that?" House had almost forgotten about Cuddy´s presence and he jumps a little as her voice resonates around the living-room, answering his question.

"Cameron is right House. Jared can´t be alive. But…I don´t know. Something isn´t right here. You have to admit that, Cameron."

"I never denied that. But maybe…maybe we're overacting a little." _If only I could believe that myself._

House gives her the evil eye while snorting aloud.

"You know what? It´s about time that we do something. And we are going to do it right now." Cuddy grabs her coat while pointing a finger at Cameron. "You pack some things." Turning around to House, she is silent for a brief moment, studying him closely. "Maybe you can stay here while I´m gone. I´ll be back in an hour. Can you do that?" House nods, his eyes watching her suspiciously as she walks toward the door.

"I will. But where're you going?" The only answer is the sound of the door closing. He turns around to Cameron who looked as puzzled as he did. "What´s she up to?"

"If only I knew."

The two of them sat, just looking at each other, neither of them speaking for several minutes. House finally breaks the silence with a demand. "I think it´s time that you tell me what happened. To tell me what's going on here. And don´t try to give me a fake story again. I want the truth, Cameron. I have the right to know what I´m in now."

"If you would have listened in the beginning, you wouldn´t be involved right now."

Cameron turns away from him, trying to escape him by going into her bedroom, but she finds herself being followed by House, who is grimacing behind her back.

"Nuh-uh, don´t get nasty Cameron. "

"You are the nasty one here, but that´s nothing new. In fact, the being nasty thing is what you do best. Oh, beside the nosing-around-habit." Cameron opens her wardrobe, searching for a travel bag while sighing, obviously peeved at House.

"Whoa! Words can hurt, you know that, right? But, you know, I´m fine with it. Go on; send little stakes at me, my tortured heart can stand that. But it won't stop me from getting my answers. Not this time."

Cameron stops her search for the bag and walks to her bed, sitting down at it. "So there´s nothing I can do to make you go the hell away?" Her question surprises him a little, but he tries not to show it. "No. Nothing you can do."

"You´re a bastard, House."

"That´s what people say about me."

"Fine then. I´ll tell you. But not here. How about a walk?" She stands up again, looking at him.

"I don´t think that you should walk around, you know? Could be dangerous. I mean with all the little cats roaming around the streets."

"Funny."

No, no! Where are they going? Jared slams his fist on his desk while watching Cameron and this cripple leaving the apartment. This was not going like he had planned. He had to think over his plans. He couldn't wait any longer. This cripple was more a threat than he had thought. He grabs the gun that lies in his desk drawer, making sure that she's loaded and ready to be used.

House looks at Cameron as the two of them walk down the street, moving away from her apartment. "So, any reason why you can´t tell me the story in your private place?"

"Yeah. Because I want to keep my place as free as possible from bad memories. It may sound foolish, but I don´t want to…speak that things out loud there."

"You´re right. It sounds foolish. But maybe that´s because I don´t know all the meanings behind your behavior. So, you want to enlighten me before Cuddy comes back and finds out that we´re gone?"

"Listen, House. I´m not going to tell you everything. Just…the important things. But I can´t give you any more than that."

"Are you going to start telling me eventually?"

"Alright, how's this: I was 22 years old and my husband had just died. My life was…empty. Then there came this class reunion invitation. At first I didn´t want to go, but then I thought that a little fun couldn't be bad, so I went to the reunion. And there I met…Jared. We…had a thing back in High-School. So we met there, left the reunion and spend the evening together. Well, one thing led to another, and we became a couple. Was good for almost a year, than things got bad. I…"

"No. I will not let you keep doing the same thing as Cuddy. First of all, you tell me exactly what "things got bad" means!" He is about to grab Cameron´s arm when he stops himself, remembering her avoidance of being touched.

"It means that one day I became aware that he was a drug dealer, and he caught me. He abducted me…"

"…So that you couldn´t go to the police." He again resists the urge to touch her as her answer surprises him.

"If it were only that easy." He looks at her puzzled, trying to understand her reply.

"What do you mean?"

"Hey! Do you want to hear my story or do you want to play therapist?" House doesn't answer her, so Cameron begins to speak again.

"Well, as I said, he abducted me. First I…we…we were on his boat. He had to deliver another package. After that, he…moved me to an old house in the woods, near New Jersey. After a few days, he dragged me to New York. He had a house there that I didn´t know about. After a week, I managed to escape him." Cameron sighs, seeing her last encounter with Jared before her eyes.

_This may be her last chance. No, it definitely was her last chance. Now or never. Holding her right arm close to her body, trying to reduce the burning pain the fabric of her shirt causes when it rubs over her wounded shoulder, she moves toward the door. Her heart beats loud in her chest, the blood in her veins rushes through her body, filling her ears with the sound of it. She can hear his footsteps. _

_Horror fills her body at the very thought that this attempt to get away could fail. No, she can´t loose this upcoming fight. If she were to lose, she'd find herself in another country by tomorrow. The door opens and Jared walks in, his eyes searching for her. He holds a white cloth in his hand and she knows that he's planning to drug her again. The grip of the lamp in her left hand tightens as she rises up behind him. She lifts the lamp, ready to hit him on the head with it, but at the very second Jared turns around, absorbing the hard whack with his arm. But he is about to loose his balance and she strikes another blow, this one sending him to the ground. She turns around; trying to leave the room, but suddenly his hand grabs her ankle, causing her to fall. NO, NO! _

_She feels the weight of his body on her own as she tries to crawl away from him, when a terrible wave of pain slices through takes possession of her shoulder as Jared places his arm on it, applying pressure to the tender wound. Against her will, a small cry escapes her throat. "Having any pain, honey?" He smiles at her and presses his arm deeper onto her shoulder while he reaches for the cloth with his other hand. She tries to move her shoulder to another place, but the pain and Jared´s grip on her is too strong. But she can´t let him win. She has to try to escape him, at any costs. by all means. _

_Of the corner of her eyes she can see his hand with the cloth coming down to her face, ready to press it onto her mouth. She struggles and tries to kick him with her legs, but fails. Think, Cameron, think! And as the cloth covers her mouth and nose, she comes up with an idea. It's a lousy one, but it´s her last chance. _

_Within seconds, her body goes limp and Jared watches as her eyes are closing slowly, her breathing becoming calm. Jared moves a little and removes the cloth from her face and suddenly her hand comes up, striking him. It is then that she sees the gun, plunging into the waistband of his pants. Without thinking she grabs the gun, pointing it at him and pulling the trigger as he once again comes down at her, attempting to strike her. trying to hit her. Blood covers her body. _

"Heelloo! Anybody there?" House´s voice brings her out of her memory and back to the present.

"What did you say?"

"I asked how you know that he´s dead."

"Because I… shot him. And because the doctors in the hospital said so." Cameron waits for a reaction. A reply, a disgusted expression on his face, but she doesn´t find what she is searching for. House looks at her, fully aware of her observation of him.

"What? Are you waiting to see me run away from you?"

"Actually, yes." _Give the truth a run._

"Aha. Because you killed that son of a bitch that held you captive for weeks."

Cameron didn't know how to reply to that. She turns her face away from him, but House isn´t about to let it go that easily. "There´s no need in feeling guilty, you know? You only protected yourself. He deserved his death."

"How can you say that? You never met him." _What are you talking about, girl? Shut your mouth!_

"Because people like him deserve death. I don´t have to know him to see the truth in my words, and you know that Cameron." His finger touches her cheek as he speaks and he is happy to see that Cameron isn´t afraid of being touched. "You know…" A sound behind him catches his attention and he turns around.

But he sees it to late. The fist comes to fast, his cane taken away from him immediately. Pain rushes through his cheekbone as he loses his balance, falling to the hard sidewalk ground, leaving him there helpless. A brown shoe suddenly appears before his face, immediately before it smashes into him. He lifts his head back up and looks into the barrel of a gun as he hears a click at the same time.

"No!" He hears Cameron screaming, followed by a moan from the stranger and than the gun leaves his field of vision. The brown shoe shows up one last time, landing in his face. Before loosing consciousness, he hears a last scream from Cameron, but this one sounds different. It was full of terror, not of shock. As darkness overcomes him, he hears one last word coming from Cameron. "Jared."

Cameron steps backward, unable to take her eyes off the man before her. _RUN! JUST RUN!_

"You…you…" With wide eyes she sees him coming nearer toward her, smiling.

"Have you lost your ability to speak in full sentences, darling?" His hand with the gun in it points at her before suddenly turning down to House's still form.

"NO! JARED!"

He smiles at her, almost warmly. "It´s okay, Cameron. I´m not going to kill him. Not if you come over here to me." He's still smiling and it makes Cameron sick. She still can´t believe what she sees. Angst fills her, knowing angst. But looking over to House, she knows that it´s up to her to save his life. And there was only one way to save it. In order to save House, she had to give herself up to Jared. Slowly she walks over to him, her whole body shaking.

When she is just a step away from him, Jared reaches out to her, grabbing her forearm.

"Jared, please…"

"No please. Not this time." As he fires the gun, Cameron screams and drops down, clutching House´s body, trying to find the bullet wound. "No no no no no…"

"Uups!"

"You…you little bastard. You…" A single prick stops her words and, shocked and surprised, she turns her head to the side, looking at her arm where the needle is still stuck. Falling to the side she lands in Jared's arms as he smiles broadly at her before her vision goes black.


	14. Chapter 14

**Author´s note: I don´t own House, I just play a little with them.**

**As always, thank you Katie-girl!**

The lights are moving back and forth, faster and slower, changing colors every time House opens his eyes. For a second he wondered. Why was he lying on the sidewalk in the dark with a burning pain in his upper arm? He remembers walking down the street with Cameron, talking about that Jared guy, when someone hit him hard in the face, and then shot at him. But now, Cameron is nowhere to be seen. It is then that he realizes that the lights are coming from the cars that are passing him, unable to see the weak body on the ground. Help. He had to get help. Slowly House reaches for his mobile phone, trying to remember what to do. Ambulance. He should call an ambulance.

The moment Cuddy had entered Cameron´s apartment, only to find emptiness and quietness, she knew that something had happened. Something must have. Even though she knew that both House and Cameron would have the guts to walk around the streets, regardless of her orders to stay inside, she also knew that they at least would have been back in time. But neither of them is. She almost jumps as her mobile phone inside her handbag starts to ring. Looking at the display, seeing House´s number, she starts to think about all the insults she would throw at him and later at Cameron.

"House! Where the hell are you two?" She hears sirens in the background, and fast footsteps.

"Listen Cuddy; Someone hit and shot me. When I woke up, Cameron was gone." _Oh my god._

"Are you, is Cameron…" Not knowing what to say, the shock stronger than her ability to think, she let´s the unfinished sentence hang in the air.

"I´m fine, it´s only a flesh wound. –Cuddy, Cameron said something right before everything went black. I think she said Jared." _No no, that can´t be right. The attacker can´t be Jared. My brother is dead._

"No, that can´t be. Maybe you…"

"Listen, Cuddy, for once in your life, we don´t have the time to argue about that part! Let me ask you something: What if I´m right, what if Cameron said that name? What if it is him? What do you know about him? I mean, has Cameron told you anything about him? We need to know more about guy." She can´t answer that question without thinking about it. House still don´t knows that Jared was…god forbid… **is** her brother. But now is not the time to make any further lies about that. There's no point now in hiding it.

"I knew him very well. He was my half brother."

"You mean: He is." Somehow, House's lack of surprise does not surprise her.

"Meet me at the clinic. And bring a photo of your brother with you."

"What the hell took you so long? Had to do something else important before coming in?" House´s angry voice greets a despaired and exhausted Cuddy as she enters the treatment room.

Ignoring the remark she walks toward him, stopping at the patient´s bed he is sitting on, her eyes lying worriedly on his arm where a bandage covers his wound. "It´s a flesh wound, like I said. The bullet only scratched my arm. Only needed a few stitches. I´m used to being be a target for bullets." Cuddy remains silent; her thoughts are fully on Cameron now, seeing that House is alright.

"The photo?" he asks while grabbing his coat and jumping to his feet's.

Her distant yes are looking right through him and he snaps his fingers before her face, causing her to come back into reality. "Huh?"

"The photo!" Gosh, sometimes he felt the urge to shake this woman, hard.

"Oh, yeah. Here you go." She hands him an old, crimpled photo, immediately seeing the emotional change on his face. "What? Is that…did he shoot you?"

House shakes his head. "I don´t know. Could be. Size and weight fits. But I've seen this guy before." He looks up at Cuddy, his eyes locked into hers. "He was at Amanda Tiek´s office. Talking to her."

"Maybe we should let the police handle this, House." House stops in his steps, turning back to Cuddy who´s not sure if she should just let him go or not.

"The police? You mean the same union that took care of your brother the last time?" Cuddy´s head turns down as a loud sigh escapes her mouth. "Okay, but I´m coming with you."

"I what? Lisa, what is he talking about?" She looks bewildered at House, whose cane hangs in the air, pointing at her while he stares down at her.

"Did you hear what happened?" he asks before Cuddy is able to answer the question.

"Yes, and actually the police was already here, and I told them everything about Dr. Cameron. From the abduction, the circumstances to his death." She now stares back at House, one eyebrow lifted.

"You mean everything till he disappeared."

"Lisa, I really don´t know what this man is talking about! I´m about to lose my patience with this cane-guy!"

House snorts while placing the photo of Jared in her field of vision. "Ever seen that guy?" The therapist takes the photo, nodding. "Yes. He came in once, must have been last week and we had a conversation. But he never showed up again after that. Why? I mean why is that…holy crap! Don´t tell me that this is the guy!"

"He is." House turns around to Cuddy who finally had to admit that House was right all the time; that her brother is very alive, now with Cameron in his grasp. She had sat down or her legs would give in right now. How could something like this happen, again? How could he be alive while everybody thought that he had died years ago? And – to think about that almost let´s her vomit – how are they supposed to find Cameron?

While handing back the picture to House, Dr. Tiek opens her door fully. "Come on in. I want to hear exactly what happened. Maybe I can help with creating an profile of him."

"So he attacked you from behind. He took your cane and hit you; you went down. And then?"

"Then he kicked me, and I saw a gun, but suddenly he stopped, something distracted him. It was Cameron, I guess. She screamed at him. Then he kicked me again. Before everything went black, I heard Cameron saying Jared. "

"My god." Cuddy´s voice almost breaks as she speaks. "Why couldn´t you two just stay in her apartment? Like I told you? Then maybe this would never have happened!" She´s now on the verge of screaming at him, but his guilty face stops her.

"You think I don´t know that? I shouldn´t have pressed her to tell me everything."

"What do you mean?" Tiek looks suspicious at him, her voice full of curiosity.

"Because that´s the reason we left her apartment. She agreed to tell me, but not in her private place. She said something about not wanting to have bad memories hanging there."

"You´re really not as smart as you seem to think, you know that? You can´t walk around and pretend to know everything right now. Especially not from a traumatized person!"

House begins to reply, but Cuddy waves him off with her hand. "What do you think Amanda? What does he want from Cameron?" Her eyes filled with fear, Cuddy´s not sure that she wants to know.

"You can´t see it that way. He wants nothing _from_ her. He simply wants _her_." Looking over to House she adds: "And with shooting at you, we have our first clue of how his mind works. It´s only a flesh wound, you said?"

House nods, not sure of the direction the therapist is going.

"So he chooses not to kill you, he probably never wanted to. He meant to show you a lesson; get your hands off my girl. And I bet that he will tell her that you are dead. Just to make her feel guilty."

"You think he will hurt her? She hasn't told me about…what happened between them. She only told me the basic storyline." Cuddy closes her eyes at House's question while the therapist thinks a moment about this before answering.

"I am afraid that he will show the same behavior as years ago. After all, he obviously can´t see or understand the damage he has done. And I´m sure that he has planned this for years, and for some reason, he now decided to make the final move."

"Wake up. Come on, wake up beautiful."

Huh? Is there someone talking to her? Is that a touch of a hand on her cheek? And why is it so cold? Cold and dark? Her head…dizzy and heavy, as if…Wait. Why is the hand moving down along her neck?

"Open your eyes." That voice! She recognizes it, it reminds her of someone. But who? And why is the hand now on her belly? Or are there two hands? It would explain the gentle pressure along her back. She has to open her eyes, but they feel way too heavy. Maybe it would be easier to just keep them closed, she could go back to sleep, escaping this nightmare she obviously has. _Oh, no, that´s not right, Cameron. You have to open your eyes to on order to get rid of that ugly dream._

"Open your eyes, Cameron." Boy, now she remembers that voice. The ever-so-gentle-and-caring-voice of Jared! So she really was having a bad nightmare, but at the same time, the pressure on her back and the hand on her belly are tell a different story. "Open your eyes." There it was again. How can a nightmare be so real? She has to wake up. Suddenly she remembers something. She sees a face. House´s? Yes! She was with House when something happened. Something…just what? Damn, his voice now seems to be right in her head.

"Are you awake now?"

"Have to wake up." She mumbles to herself, slowly finding her way back to reality. Her memory is coming back, and with it the terror of it. Jared. House. A gun, the shot. The needle in her arm. Jared. A single moan escapes her throat.

"Something wrong with you?"

Slowly she opens her eyes, trying to see something in the darkness. Then she sees him, right before her, smiling lightly. She realizes that his hands are not touching her anymore, and indeed, they never had. The pressure on her back was coming from the chair she's sitting in, and the touch she feels on her stomach is coming from her own hands, bound together. _Think, think. Don´t show weakness. That´s what he wants to see._

"Sorry if I scared you back on the street. Didn´t meant to." _Oh my god, how am I supposed to deal with that?_

"You…sh…shot House."

"You mean that cripple? Yeah, I think I did. Come on, the world doesn´t need him really." Cameron closes her eyes, trying to banish the image of him lying on the cold ground, blood on his body.

A light wind tells her when he comes toward her, the sound of his breath getting louder. As his hand touches her cheek, he asks: "Why don´t we talk about us? We could start with you trying to kill me."


	15. Chapter 15

**Haunted Chapter 15**

_A light wind tells her when he comes toward her, the sound of his breath getting louder. As his hand touches her cheek, he asks: "Why don´t we talk about us? We could start with you trying to kill me."_

His words echo in the dark room, filling Cameron's ears as she tries to understand his words and his question. Her head still feels dizzy, her body sleepy. The burning touch, coming from his fingers on her cheek, seems almost impossible to bear. She turns her head a little to the side, but his hand follows her face.

"Don´t …t…touch me."

"Don´t tell me what to do." He laughs as Cameron tries to pull away from his touch.

"So, I'm still waiting for an answer." His laughter had stopped, and is replaced by an icy voice.

"I…protected my…myself." Telling him the truth is the only thing she can think of to do right now. Her mind is too dizzy, too shocked to even think of another way to deal with him right now.

"And the first idea you came up with to…_protect yourself_… was to shoot me?" His face looks somewhat hurt.

"Yes." A single word, a single whisper that fills the room with its truth. It is the only audible sound besides their breathing before Jared makes a noise as he lifts his shirt, revealing the scar on his chest.

"Look what you´ve done, Cameron."

House looks suspicious to Dr. Tiek, her last words still in his head.

"And do you have any idea what his final move may be?" Dr. Tiek shrugs her shoulder, unsure of what to say. Adding more angst and fear by telling her theory doesn´t seem to be a good move right now. At least not in Dr. Houses presence.

"I still can´t believe all this. I don´t understand it. He's supposed to be dead!" Cuddy´s voice becomes hysterical, her body language showing her anger. Her eyes move back and forth between the therapist and House, but neither of them can offer her reassurance, or the answers she is looking for. She lets herself fall into one of the blue armchairs, resting her head in her hands. "I just don´t get it. All these years we've thought that he was dead. We had no reason to believe otherwise. He completely fooled us."

"You see, Cuddy, that´s what makes sociopaths, and psychopaths as well, as dangerous as they are. They are very intelligent, at least the most of them. They have the ability to build a plan, a very smart plan. And they have the patience to carry out their plan, right down to the smallest detail, often watching and waiting for a long time for the right opportunity."

"That still gives us no answer to _how_ and _who_ and _why_. _How_ did he survive in the first place? _Who_ helped him? And _why_ after waiting so long? As interesting as your little profiling may be, Dr. Tiek, it´s not helping us. All you´ve said and all the theory's you´ve stated? I don´t need you to know all of that. Not really."

Both Cuddy and Dr. Tiek are looking surprised at House, whose eyes are closed, his head hanging down. House´s cane reminds them of the ticking of a clock as he knocks it on the white carpet, not even fully aware of his own movements.

"House, she is only trying to help us."

"Well, if that´s all she can do to help us, than we´re better off without her." His voice sounds angry, cutting. He stands up, giving the therapist the evil eye while moving toward the front door.

"Where are you going?" Cuddy intends to follow him, but House stops her with his cane.

"I´m doing what I always do. I go snooping. You stay here. Maybe our great therapist can´t help us dealing with that Jared guy, but maybe she can help _you_." He looks straight into her eyes, seeing her surprise.

"What? Look at you. You´re not really any help either. You still can´t even believe what´s going on here, not to mention the fact that your charming brother is walking around. No, you stay here, I'll come back."

Not giving Cuddy any chance to reply, he leaves the house, making his way to his car without looking back.

"I said, look what you´ve done, Cameron." His hand grabs her chin, forcing her to look at his chest.

"I spend _months_ recovering from that wound, from the visible wound. Not to speak of the other wounds you caused me."

Despite the dangerous situation she is in, Cameron suddenly feels the urge to laugh at his last words. _How hurt they sounded!_

"Want to tell me what´s so funny, Cameron?" His voice is almost a whisper, and Cameron knows that this is a sign that he is about to lose his patience. The lower his voice gets, the angrier he is.

"You…you speak about your _wounds._ What about m…mine? Can´t you see that I just…I did what…what I had to do?" Her head is still too dizzy for her to speak fluently, and her mouth is dry, so dry.

"I am sorry, Darling. How could I forget your wounds? Do you need me to take care of them? I do that. I do everything for you." He moves closer, his eyes scanning her face, his hands coming toward her. Suddenly, Cameron regrets her words. His almost gentle words are always betrayed by his subsequent actions; the past had taught her that. Intuitively, her body stiffens, trying to lean further into the chair she is sitting on.

"Well, let me see your shoulder blade."

He should have done that in the first place. Not bothering with the police´s barrier tape, House enters Cameron´s apartment, closing the door softly behind him. He still felt that it was a waste of time to listen to the therapist's words. _Precious_ time. His bullet wound hurts, but he ignores it.

He decides to start in her living-room, remembering the police officer talking about the camera they had found in there. That crafty little bastard. The whole time he had listened, had heard all of the conversation. He had watched and sure as hell had felt his power. But the real question behind that was the _how long_. How long had he watched and listened? One day, one week or one month? How long had the camera been there? House feels sick enough just by knowing that this son of a bitch had watched the whole conversation yesterday, and he can´t help but feel even more sick thinking about the possibility that Cameron had been watched all along.

"You know, I watched you for quite some time. Weeks, to be more precise. You seem to have a hard time. Like something is bothering you. Is that so? Is something bothering you?" He stands behind her, his fingers traveling over the scarred over skin on her shoulder.

"Mmhhm."

"It´s okay, I understand. But now, everything will be fine."

He found nothing new in her living-room. House begins to feel frustrated as he too finds nothing in her kitchen and bathroom. The only room left was her bedroom. He starts searching through her wardrobe, moving over to her nightstand, even searching under her bed, finding nothing. Damn! He has to find something! There was _always_ evidence in the patients apartments, it can´t be different in this case. He won't accept that. Then, out of the corner of his eyes, House sees a brown box, siting under her window, locked up tight. He goes back into the kitchen, grabs a knife and returns to the box, cracking the lock within seconds.

Opening the box, he finds only a single folder and a bundle of letters. Grabbing the folder, he reads the word on it. "Patient report." Suddenly feeling unsure of what to do, House sits down on her bed, looking down at the papers in his hands. This must be it. The original report. Opening it, the first thing he sees is a picture of Cameron, lying in a bed, surrounded by medical instruments. He knows then that he will never be able to forget the look of her face. The colors, the pain. And reading further, he´s almost sure that he will never forget a single word of the report. Nobody could. After reading the last page, House slowly stands up, goes into the bathroom and vomits in to the toilet. Knowing the truth behind Cameron´s lies is hard to take; but knowing that she´s again in the power of that…monster is impossible to bear. He has to find her. He just has to. Fast. It is not a puzzle any more. And maybe it never was.

The first thing she becomes aware of is the pain coming from her shoulder. Opening her eyes, she sees that she is no longer sitting in the chair. Now she lies on a bed in a different room. And this room isn´t surrounded by darkness. The lights coming from the ceiling are almost too bright, hurting her eyes, but she refuses the urge to close them. Looking around, she almost screams as she sees Jared standing in the door. Without saying a word he turns out the lights and closes the door. And Cameron is not able to tell if he left the room or not.


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: I don´t own House M.D, wish I would…**

**Finally! Im finally able to update my story, I can´t believe it! I want to thank all the lovely people who reviewed the last chapter(s) and asked me to update soon. I hope that I can post the next chapter sooner, hopefully within the next two weeks!**

**Haunted Chapter 16**

Darkness surrounds her, leaving Cameron wondering about Jared´s whereabouts. Was he in the room? Behind the door? Or had he left the building? It reminds her why she doesn´t likes the dark. Never did. Darkness not only leaves you in utterly blind, it leaves you unaware. She tries to appraise how much time has passed with her lying on the bed in this dark room, wondering if she is the only person there. In the end, she can´t tell. Her brain is still not working properly, the drug still too strong in her system. Thankfully, the headache is slowly fading, and she wishes that the same would happen with the pain in her shoulder. She had tried to move a bit, to place her weight more onto her other shoulder, but her arms bound together over her head, hadn´t allowed it. Every second of lying on the freshened wound requires all of her strength not to whimper. But no, if Jared is in the room, she would not allow him to enjoy watching her suffer. _Think of something else. Deflect the pain._ House. His lifeless form lying on the cold sidewalk, his blood coloring the ground. Was he really dead, or was this just another one of Jared's cruel games? She can´t tell. And did she really want to know? What if Jared had told the truth and he is dead? She couldn´t handle this, she just couldn´t. She would not be able to live with the knowledge that she had killed the man she loves. It did not matter that she had not pulled the trigger. That gun had been fired for only one reason; his connection to her. Her love for him.

She can still feel House´s lips on hers. It had surprised her that he had responded, and she had told him so. _"But you kissed back"._ Now the sentence sounded like one coming from a teenager. And yes, it had hurt her that he didn´t seem to care when he found out about Chase and her having sex. After she had broken up with Chase she had watched House´s attention toward Cuddy. That too had hurt, but she couldn't blame Cuddy for this. Not after all she had done for her. She knows that the older women desperately wanted a child and it had been hard to watch every failure. Though, she doubts that House would be the father Cuddy is searching for.

The pain in her shoulder is getting stronger, almost too much to take. Lifting her face to the side Cameron tries to figure out the lines of the wall and the door. Is there any window? A second door, maybe? No. She sees a chair standing right in front of the closed door and she is almost sure that she sees no human body sitting there, but she could be wrong. Turning her heard to the other side, a whimper escapes her mouth. The pain in her shoulder was hard to take, but the face right in front of hers even harder. Even in the darkness she can tell that he´s smiling. _Son of a bitch._

The two cups of tea, standing on a silver salver, are clanking against each other as Dr. Tiek warily makes her way to the living-room, her eyes resting on her boss, Lisa Cuddy. Right in this moment, the women sitting before her on the blue chair reminds Tiek more of a wounded and scared animal than of a respected leader of a famous hospital. But she understands. Truth is not an easy fellow. She slightly wonders what Cuddy´s reaction would be if she told her the whole truth right now. But no, theres no need to rush things. There was plenty of time.

"Lisa." Cuddy is not reacting; her mind too deep in an other world, a world she had thought was gone long ago. Dr. Tiek tries once more to get her attention, this time her voice louder.

"Lisa. I made tea." Now Cuddy lifts her head, looking as if she was seeing the women before her for the first time in her life.

"Oh, I'm sorry." She rubs her forehead as she lets out a small sigh of desperation. "What did you say?"

"I made tea. You´ve been shivering since you came by. Maybe it will warm you up a little." Dr. Tiek hands Cuddy one of the cups before she sits down on the couch, her eyes never leaving her boss. She gives Cuddy a couple of minutes to come back into the real world before she speaks again.

"Maybe you wanna talk about all this?" A try.

"No. I am not one of your patients, Amanda. I can handle it." Her voice reveals anger, but that is no surprise for the seasoned therapist.

"She's a great person, you know. Charming, caring. Lovely."

"What? What are you talking about?" Cuddy´s eyes show confusion and Amanda Tiek smiles a little.

"Dr. Cameron, I mean. I imagine that she´s one hell of a doctor, one of those who never give up on their patients." A simple statement.

Cuddy nods, almost fiercely "Yes."

"And wouldn´t you think a woman who fights so hard for other people, is strong enough to fight for her own life?" Even barely knowing the young immunologist, Dr. Tiek has no doubt about her own words.

"She already did that." Cuddy´s voice is almost a whisper now.

"Exactly, and she will do it again. I wouldn´t be surprised to hear that she has a lot of fights with this House. He is her superior, right?"

"Yes, she will, they have…I mean you´re right with everything you´ve said."

"Im sure they make a unique couple, the two of them. A man filled with bitterness and sarcasm and a woman filled with hope and love. Huh. Sounds very explosive."

"Absolutely. They strain my nerves a lot." Cuddy almost smiles a little.

"He can´t stand her view of the world, right? He can´t understand her trust and belief in human beings because he don´t knows her."

One puzzle solved, another unsolved. That´s what he would think naturally, but not this time. House stands perfectly still in the bathroom, the smell of his own vomit filling his nose, his stomach still rebelling. For once in his life, House is too shocked to think or to act. He knows that he should search further, but he can´t move. Regret and guilt paralyze him. If only he would have known… it all. Not the little pieces Cameron had thrown toward him. He remembers their last conversation, right before the bullet had hit him. He just hopes, no, begs, that it wouldn´t be the last conversation with her. He hasn´t yet found any clue or link to Cameron´s whereabouts. For a brief moment he wonders if he would ever find one, but he dismisses the thought immediately. He knows that he has something to work with now. He walks back into the bedroom, his eyes resting on the report lying on the bed, right where he had left it. Somewhere in this file, buried deep between Cameron´s testimony and the reports from the police and hospital, lays a hint, pointing toward Cameron´s location. He just has to find it. Maybe he should walk back to that therapist, and ask her to read the file. But then he remembers that she already knows the report. If she would remember something important, she would have told the police earlier. Or would she? He still doesn't trust her. Something about that woman makes him cautious. Same goes for the police. They showed their limitations **twice**. First by not finding Cameron and then by letting that scum face escape and disappear. No. He wouldn´t put Cameron´s life in those hands.

Walking over to the bed he grabs the file and starts to read it again, beginning with the police report. On June 17th, 1999, a woman named Charlize Mallies had called the police to report the disappearance of her friend Allison Cameron. She had last seen her two days before and she hadn´t shown up at the University or at their meeting that day, as planned. She was not answering the door or phone, neither was her boyfriend Jared Carter. Also his boat was not at the pier. To House´s initial surprise, the police immediately began a search, but he quickly discovered the reason behind that on the next page. The police were thinking that Cameron and Jared were fleeing. The police, or moreso the narks, had watched the two of them over a couple of months, accusing them both of dealing with drugs. That part, along with Cameron being a suspect is not new to House, but it still makes him angry. Two days later, on June 19th, the police received a call from Cameron, coming from Jared´s boat. She gave them the coordinates of the yacht, but the phone call was interrupted before she could tell them any more. The police came too late; the boat was found empty. It was four weeks later when a police officer stopped a car near a forest in Boston, because; the driver had urinated on the roadside, that the officer recognized Jared from the search photo, but was taken out by him with a branch. He later stated gave to protocol that a young woman was sitting on the nearside, obviously sleeping. Sleeping? House doubts that. Cameron probably was drugged. That also would explain why the police had found no traces of a struggle on the boat, or how Jared was able to take Cameron out on a street. He skims through the pages until he finds the hospital report, searching for Cameron´s blood results. _Here it is. Traces of Ventanyl. _Interesting. It leaves House to assume that Cameron was drugged but not unconscious for the most of the time. Ventanyl only takes out a person for about two hours. For a longer result you have to give a higher doses, but there wasn´t enough Ventanyl in Cameron´s blood for that. He briefly wonders whether Jared knew, or now knows that. And with that, he wonders if Cameron ever took advantage of that, if she ever just pretended to be unconscious. He hopes so. It could give her a chance to free herself or to call for help. Flipping back to the police report he tries to find a strategy to Jared´s actions. And, almost to his own surprise, he finds a first clue. As fast as his leg allows, he leaves Cameron´s apartment and gets in his car, making his way to Dr. Tiek's house. He has to speak to Cuddy.

Things had gone exactly the way he had wanted. That cripple House wounded, and Cameron with him again, thinking that her boss was dead. He knows her. With telling her that House was dead she would feel guilty. Good. It is only fair that she experienced some of the feelings he had gone through. Pain. Suffering. Betrayal. It was just like he had said to her. WOUNDS. He reaches forward to touch her face, but Cameron dodges. How he's missed her. He almost can´t believe that she's with him now. Forever.

"What´s wrong? I can remember times where you had…craved my touch." His voice is mocking.

"Screw...ou." _Damn drug, damn tongue!_

"Did you say something? It sounded like you might have." No response.

"No? I thought you just said screw you´." He shrugs his shoulders. "Maybe I just imagined that, cause" Jared leans forward, his breath now touching Cameron´s skin, "you wouldn´t say something like that to me, right?"

Cameron, barely breathing now, just hopes that her eyes are not giving away her angst. _Don´t show him your weakness. Don´t show him that you´re afraid. Be strong._

Leaning back, he makes himself more comfortable on the bed as he looks at her. "I want to ask you something." He plays with his fingers, sighing, before he speaks again. "Did you really think that I was dead?" ...He answers himself, laughing. "Of course you thought so. Let me ask you another question. Have you", he now plays with **her** fingers, "ever slept with another man after I…disappeared?" _Oh no. No._ _He knows. He knows about Chase. _ His fingers now press hers. "Have you?" _God, please help me._ She knows that she must answer him. There is no other choice. Silence or a obvious lie would only make him angrier.

"I did." She doesn't dares to look at him. The pressure on her fingers is getting stronger, almost hurting.

"At least you're truthful. But I´m not sure if that will help this…what´s his name, Chase?"" His voice is gentle as ever, his touch now again caressing.

"No. Ont hurt im." He laughs. "You're words are sounding funny when you´re…sleepy. Did I ever tell you that before?" He had, and Cameron remembered very well. He had said that it sounded sweet and funny´. _Sick bastard._

"You know, you shouldn´t worry about him. He's not worth it."

Something is wrong. He´s too calm, too nice and Cameron doesn´t know why. She just told him that she had slept with another man and she does not see anger in his eyes nor can she hear it in his voice. Something is wrong. _Terribly wrong._

"I watched you." Cameron knows exactly what he means. "Didn´t you once accused me of raping you? Didn´t you said something about _I was too weak from the drugs you gave me_´? Is it just me or weren´t you drugged the first time you slept with that Chase?" Now Cameron knows what´s wrong. He is not angry. He is hurt, deeply wounded. deadly.

Standing up from the bed Jared walks over to the small window, taking a deep breath and grabbing something small before returning to Cameron's side. Again he sits down on the bed, his hands reaching for Cameron, touching her arms.

"I missed you. I really did. I thought about you every single minute over the last years. I missed everything about you. Your scent. Your touch. Your voice. Everything. It broke my heart to watch you sleeping with that guy. But it's going to be fine now. You can make it up to me. " Fear, knowing fear, creeps inside of Cameron. She just prays that he is not about to do what she thinks he is.

"I want to sleep with you. You can say no…"

"No!"

"…but it won´t stop me. You could sleep with that guy while being under the influence of drugs, so that´s not a hindrance for you. But I understand now. It was my fault. I didn´t played enough attention to you. I will now."

And as his hands reach her belly, Cameron knows that he means every word he said.


End file.
